excuses

If He Doesn't Ask You Out, He Just Isn't Into You (Another Heartwarming Message From Greg!)

73

By: Chelsea Dagger

First things first: does anyone have Gandalf’s cellphone number? I just texted Dumbledore asking if he’d be down for some mano-a-mano combat with Geezer the ...

Imaginary Friends-Not Just for Kids.

60

By: Contributor

abbyblue11 is a GENIUS. This scheme is going to change our LIVES.—Sparkitors

Two years ago, I was dumped by ...

Auntie SparkNotes: No Sleep Til...

30

By: kat_rosenfield

Dear Auntie,
I've got problems. Lots of 'em. I've learned to cope for the most part, though, and work around my issues. But I have this...

Awkwardness: A Comprehensive Guide

17

By: Contributor

From cell phone excuses to awkward turtles, JimSauce has you covered.—Sparkitors

For some reason, teenagers are really prone to getting into awkward situations. And ...

What to Do When You're Caught Grinding

30

By: Ashley Spencer

Akon might think it's fine to see you “winding and grinding,” but your teachers and chaperones are not inclined to agree. To them, grinding is ...

The 10 Best Excuses to Get Out of Gym Class

26

By: Chelsea Dagger

There are some days when the thought of pulling on your damp sweatpants and getting nailed in the left eye by 38 shuttlecocks just isn’t ...

8 Reasons I Love Hanukkah

14

By: Contributor

thelastcard makes some solid points; after all, you can't really argue with Adam Sandler.—Sparkitors

After reading violet_hill1944's ...

Foolproof Homework Excuses

37

By: Contributor

J. Phoenix just made our faces fall off. From laughing. Totally makes sense. Yep. —Sparkitors

1. It was confiscated for national security reasons, I ...

The Best Excuses for Skipping Homecoming

61

By: Kathryn_Williams

A high school Homecoming is really about three things:

1. Showing school spirit.

2. Cementing the place of football players and cheerleaders in ...

Getting Out of a Pop Quiz: The Best and Worse Excuses

37

By: Lucy Hutchinson

You know the feeling: the moment of sinking dread when your teacher walks in, smiling maniacally and carrying a stack of papers much too big ...