Books

Dan Destroyed My English Essay (But He Also Sort of Got Me a Job, Indirectly)

21

By: Elodie

Let me paint you a little picture: it’s a late summer’s night, and I’m a hot mess. In fact, I’m teetering somewhere between "okay, it's ...

From the Department of Werewolf Awareness to Mr. Bergstein: Where Our Tail Goes When We Transform

41

By: Contributor

jolieg15, just LOL. —Sparkitors

Dear Mr. Bergstein,

As longtime readers of your columns, we must say that we are so thrilled with the attention ...

The SparkNotes Movie Club Loves Twilight (Sarcasm Hand)

184

By: Dan_Bergstein

After studying the franchise for over two years, and now having witnessed the movie version, I can say with authority: Twilight isn’t good.

There was a ...

Blogging Breaking Dawn: Part 39 (The End!)

354

By: Dan_Bergstein

Chapter Thirty-Nine: The Happily Ever After
Better Title: Can I Be Done Now?

And lo, the horror of night is broken as morning's sun silently rescues the ...

Blogging Breaking Dawn: Part 38

129

By: Dan_Bergstein

Chapter Thirty-Eight: Power
Better Title: I Have No Idea What the Hell Just Happened, but I'm Left Feeling Angry, Tired, Cheated, Bored, Gassy, and Weak

This is ...

Blogging Breaking Dawn: Part 37

128

By: Dan_Bergstein

Chapter Thirty-Seven: Contrivances
Better Title: Annoyances

Albert Miller is there. And Allan Miller. Oh man, that sounds like a dumb name. After that comes Allan G. Miller. ...

Blogging Breaking Dawn: Part 36

109

By: Dan_Bergstein

Chapter Thirty-Six: Bloodlust
Better Title: Forest Chumps

This is it! The battle is near. The good vampires have formed a line in the forest clearing. They wait ...

Blogging Breaking Dawn: Part 35

123

By: Dan_Bergstein

Chapter Thirty-Five: Deadline
Better Title: And then there were five.

This is it, gang. Five more chapters to go. Five blogs away from the finale. It's so ...

Blogging Breaking Dawn: Part 34

112

By: Dan_Bergstein

Chapter Thirty-Four: Declared
Better Title: Baby's Worst Christmas

It's a Twilight Christmas! As expected, Bella picked out the perfect gift for her child's first Christmas. No, it's ...

Blogging Breaking Dawn: Part 33

126

By: Dan_Bergstein

Chapter Thirty-Three: Forgery
Better Title: The Case of the Stupid Mystery

Who is J. Jenks? Why did Alice secretly instruct Bella to visit Jenks? What is Alice's ...