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10 Things You Should Know About the Beach

Sparkler Post
10 Things You Should Know About the Beach

1. The Beach is Awesome. This is a scientifically and socially established fact, and I want to make sure we keep it that way.

2. When you go to the beach you will return either red or brown. Red if you didn't put on sunscreen. Brown if you tan well. If you stay inside the hotel, what you did doesn't count as going to the beach.

3. Summer is high season. So is christmas break. I don't know why. I mean, you're choosing between no snow during christmas, or instant death by hypothermia. High season means that everybody thinks "Hey, let's go to the beach now." So everything is crowded which can be annoying. On the other hand you have more people to laugh at.

4. Everything is more expensive. Or do you usually buy a glass of lemonade for five bucks? Oh, and that twenty dollar bracelet that the tourist over there bought? I bought the same one inland for something like two bucks.

5. Surfing is awesome. Do it. If you don't know how, take a course. It's actually not too hard to learn, and loads of fun. Plus it makes you look cool. Just imagine:

"Whoa, who's that awesome person surfing in that video?"

"Oh, that would be me."

6. There are beautiful Sunsets. Some of the best worldwide I daresay. the sun slowly sinnking into the ocean, shedding it's last rays across the high seas, while the clouds glow amber, purple, and scarlet... see your sunset today. West coast beaches only. Sorry.

7. Sandcastles are awesome. Build at least one to make your beach trip legit. To get bonus points add a dungeon to keep Gary in, and a Sparknotes flag. If you write "Aradan is awesome" all over it, then it is the best castle ever. If I meet you in person I will buy you a pizza and ice cream. 

8. There is no way you can make it from the ocean to the other side of the sand without getting sandy again. I've tried this a thousand times. Somehow, by the time you reach the street the sand that you just washed off in the ocean is everywhere again.

9. If you're staying at a hotel make sure you have a good hangout spot at the hotel. Because if you don't you will hate your time at the hotel, which is almost half of the time that you're at the beach. This is especially necessary if you are going with friends. Otherwise you'll have to stand in the hallway, where everyone in the hotel will hear you, and know that you think the receptionist is a creep.

10. People at the beach are a lot nicer and opener than most. You can just go up to some surfer and say

"Hey dude, how's it going?" and he'll probably say something like

"Pretty chill man, just got back from surfing, now I'm gonna grab a coke with the dudes, how bout you?"

Where in the city a person in a suit would look at you and say something like :"Leave me alone or I'll call the police."

See the difference?

Bottom line, go to the beach. I can recommend Puerto Escondido in southern Mexico. Now please excuse me, homeslices, cause I gotta catch the dudes. We're gonna go surf. Later bros and sis's."

What are your beach experiences?

Tags: Vacation, random, 10 things, Beach, Should Know

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