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What To Do When You Can’t Sleep

By ContributorSeptember 10, 2010
Judging from her name, InnSomKnnYack is something of an expert on this subject!—Sparkitors Have trouble sleeping? Of course you do. I read something one time that said over 55% of American teens don’t get enough sleep. Coincidentally, that same something... More  →
What To Do When You Can’t Sleep

The Procrastinating Dork’s Guide to Senior Year

By ContributorSeptember 10, 2010
Sunny0910, you actually make us miss high school. —Sparkitors Despite the fact that I have about 80 days left until end-of-year exams THAT DECIDE MY FUTURE, instead of studying, I’m writing to warn you all of the dangers of procrastination in the final and... More  →
The Procrastinating Dork’s Guide to Senior Year

How to Name Your Online Business

By Rachel KorowitzSeptember 10, 2010
You've created MashIt.com, a site that generates perfect M.A.S.H. note responses! Or Turtlebook, the Facebook for turtles! Or Smoogle, the Google you can smell! Whatever your online business is, you're going to need the perfect name to attract the right audience, make an... More  →
How to Name Your Online Business

Blogging Wuthering Heights: Part 13

By ContributorSeptember 10, 2010
Somebody PLEASE get CoffinMaker a knife-gun already. —Sparkitors Chapter XIII AIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! It. Is. HERE. THE KNIFE GUN. *Runs around in a circle, making booming sounds with mouth* It's beautiful. It's terrible. It's terribly beautiful. I've been waiting for three months for it. It goes "Boom. Slash. Boom." It's the most awesome... More  →

Open Thread for September 10

By Emily WinterSeptember 10, 2010
Even if the photographer doesn't know it, this pic is obviously meant to symbolize modern man's inability to escape temptation, despite how many times he tries to turn away from it. Compared to temptation, even the most slick and successful modern man is small and... More  →
Open Thread for September 10

A Day in the Life of a Mankler Who Works at a Hospital

By ContributorSeptember 9, 2010
Nutty_Davey, when did you have time to write this?! —Sparkitors All the posts I’ve seen about hospitals are from people who are being treated there, not from the perspective of someone who works there. Because of that, I’ve decided to give an account of... More  →
A Day in the Life of a Mankler Who Works at a Hospital

A Guide to (Mostly Legal) Cheap Exercise

By Jon_SkindzierSeptember 9, 2010
Getting into shape is not easy. It's a sweaty, unpleasant ordeal of celery and running and misery, and the only people who make it look glamorous are the treadmill-joggers you see sprinting toward hotness as you pass by that sleek late-night gym/club. But then you... More  →

Coffinmaker's Guide to Blogging

By ContributorSeptember 9, 2010
Coffinmaker, please, just take our jobs. We can't compete with your sparkling wit and To Kill A Mockingbird references.—Sparkitors Don't try and fool me; you've thought about blogging at least once before in your online life. Maybe your friend... More  →
Coffinmaker's Guide to Blogging

Choose Your SparkNotes Flag: Round 1C

By Emily WinterSeptember 9, 2010
*hip thrust* Oi, Sparklers! My sneezy, snotty body is working from home today, so I can't count how many new flag entries we've received at our only-accessible-in-the-office inbox, contribute@sparknotes.com. BUT Chelsea D. says there are A LOT. (DOUBLE BUT, she also says she's... More  →
Choose Your SparkNotes Flag: Round 1C

Five Reasons Raisins Are Win

By ContributorSeptember 9, 2010
The letter to the Sparkitors that came with this post was so funny that we had to leave it in. Nice work, allthepeopleinthestreet! —Sparkitors Dear People of SparkNotes, First time writer, long time reader and raisin appreciator. A couple days ago I went to the... More  →