Skip over navigation

Dippus and Dashing's Do's and Don'ts of First Dating

By Lauren PassellApril 25, 2012
Dippus and Dashing are best friends, but when it comes to dating, one of them is A-OK and one of them is a DISASTRO. Can you guess which one gets all the hot babes? Dashing brings cash on the first date so that no matter what... More  →
Dippus and Dashing's Do's and Don'ts of First Dating

If the Zombie Apocalypse Happened Tomorrow, I'd Totally Want You On My Team

By Chelsea DaggerApril 24, 2012
HULLO GENTLEBUTTS AND SCHOLARS! ("Gentlebutts" sounded creepier than I meant it to, but there's no turning back now.) I'm going to keep things short and sappy: today is my 2-year anniversary as a Sparkitor, and I want to thank you guys for making the last... More  →
If the Zombie Apocalypse Happened Tomorrow, I'd Totally Want You On My Team

The Secret Journal of Taylor the Emo Blender (April 24, 2012)

By RG DanielsApril 24, 2012
::sigh:: Springtime. I guess. I can’t stop looking at Ariel. She’s the most beautiful teapot I’ve ever seen. When she whistles it’s like a dozen birds are suddenly flying into the horizon, towards a setting sun that reminds me of what it’s like to... More  →
The Secret Journal of Taylor the Emo Blender (April 24, 2012)

Has Lord of the Rings Sold Out?

By ContributorApril 24, 2012
If you’re anything like me, you’ve been marking down the days until the December 14th release of The Hobbit. As the premiere draws nearer, so also will the hype (and merchandise) increase, which leads me to this worrisome question: has The Lord of... More  →
Has Lord of the Rings Sold Out?

How to Make Friends: A Sparkler's Step-by-Step Manual!

By ContributorApril 24, 2012
Alright, fellow Spark-residents. We’ve got some serious business to deal with. While reflecting on the mysteries of life during one especially boring Algebra class, I decided to write an article on how to make friends in high school (or anywhere, for that matter). Even though... More  →
How to Make Friends: A Sparkler's Step-by-Step Manual!

Limericks About High School Life

By Lex Luthor and Ben ShurtleffApril 24, 2012
In honor of National Poetry Month, please enjoy the following limmies about being a teen: My homework has just been beset by the memes on the Internets There's a panda that sneezes... But then my comp freezes! And I'm stuck with some math I don't get. **** "I think you are truly... More  →
Limericks About High School Life

Spring Cleaning: Edit Your Closet

By SissyApril 24, 2012
There’s an old spring adage that says, “Be a good little flower and look to the sun. Then, go clean your closet, or else your mom may make you do something even worse.” Spring is the perfect time to reconfigure and de-clutter your closet. That way,... More  →
Spring Cleaning: Edit Your Closet

A Geek's Guide to Not Getting Bullied

By ContributorApril 24, 2012
I know being a geek is fun, but it's also difficult; us geeks have to worry about things like getting beaten up after school because we accidentally sat at the jocks' table in the cafeteria. Having moved around a lot and been a part if... More  →
A Geek's Guide to Not Getting Bullied

What To Do When You Can't Sleep

By SissyApril 23, 2012
Generally, those ZZZs comes easy to you, but once in a while, you just can’t coax yourself to fall into the arms of sleep. You clamp your eyes shut, refusing to open them up for any reason. You toss and turn, trying to fight off... More  →
What To Do When You Can't Sleep

Tampons and Napkins and Belts, Oh My!

By Kathryn_WilliamsApril 23, 2012
Ah, the menses. That beautiful fact of life that has terrified mankind and pubescent girls alike since the beginning of time. But a period just isn't a period without all of the delicate, discreet, and cozy trappings. Really, what would your... More  →
Tampons and Napkins and Belts, Oh My!