Every generation has a label: the Greatest Generation, Baby Boomers, Generation X, Generation Y. In the unlikely event that Sparklers doesn't catch on, you guys now have a backup label of your own: Generation Green.
Because you're the most environmentally conscious generation to tread lightly on Mother Earth, we have high hopes for you. (If you could invent a flying car that runs on oxygen, that would be great. Thanks.) The Earth Day Network expects great things, too. Maybe you started celebrating this weekend with their Flaming Lips concert on the National Mall (in which case we at SparkNotes are super jealous, because we were chained to our desks all day humming "If I Had a Hammer"). Or maybe you're waiting until Earth Day proper on April 22 to bust out your Save the Whales t-shirt and chain yourself to a tree.
They say if you want to see change, start in your own backyard. So we've come up with a few suggestions for greening your high school:
- Get rid of silverware in the cafeteria and eat with your hands instead. This will save water and energy, since there'll be no cutlery to clean. It will also bring you closer to Mother Nature's bounty of meatloaf and brussels sprouts.
- Convince your teachers to save energy by forgoing the florescent lights and holding class outside, under our natural light source: the sun.
- Harness all those calories wasted in gym class by getting rid of the track and replacing it with giant, energy-producing hamster wheels.
- Replace paper-wasting notebooks and books with green computers and Kindles.
- Pimp your school bus to run on the leftover vegetable oil from your cafeteria's daily fry fest.
- Replace your flagpole with a wind turbine.
- Replace the Doritos and ten year-old Nilla wafers in your vending machines with organic produce from your local farmers' market.
- Institute hemp backpacks as a mandatory part of the dress code.
- Give detention for failure to properly recycle (this includes you, people who put trash in the recycling bin).
Tell us how you're celebrating Earth Day.