How to Pick a Date for the Prom

Let's cut to the chase. Spring has sprung, the grass is riz, and you need to find a prom date.

“But wait,” you are probably saying. “Prom isn’t for another two months at least! I’ll have plenty of time to think about a date later!”

And to you we say, HA. HAHAHAHAHAHA. Because in today’s cutthroat prom-going world, you can’t just sidle up to anyone during homeroom and ask them to be your date. No, you must plan! You must prepare! And then, armed with the foreknowledge and unflappable confidence of a true prom professional, you must subtly convince your intended that a formalwear-clad evening spent by your side will be the most fabulous night of his or her entire life.

Daunted? Well, before you panic and decide to avoid your prom entirely, check out our expert’s guide to Prom Date Solicitation, guaranteed to help you woo with the best of ‘em.

Step 1: Choose your target.
Between the expense and the fact that you’ll have to meet and take pictures with each other’s families, prom is a bad choice for a first date. Your ideal date is somebody you already know and like.

Step 2: Test the waters.
Wait until some prom-related news is circulating, and then use it to introduce the topic of prom during conversation. (“Hey, did you hear? That girl with the vestigial tail is nominated for prom queen!”) Ask your target whether s/he is planning to attend. The idea is to get your would-be date thinking about the prom in connection with you.

Step 3: Announce your intentions…to everyone else.
This is the time to let everyone else know your plans, so that none of your friends steal your intended date from under your nose.

Step 4: Prepare to pop the question.
Get your target alone—after class, after school, or during a chance meeting in the hallway. Make sure that you are well-kempt, non-sweaty, and minty-breathed.

Step 5: Ask.
Be straightforward, flattering, and sincere.
Good: “I’d like to go to prom with you. I think we’d have a lot of fun.”
Bad: “YOU KNOW YOU WANT ME [heavy breathing].”

Need more advice on wooing your prospective prom date? We’re here for ya! Leave your question in the comments.