The only people who enjoy homework are teachers, Beelzebub, and individuals who were blinded at birth and just recently regained the ability to see (but those folks think everything is great). Perhaps the most vocal homework hater is New York fifth-grader Ben Berrafato, who has taken it upon himself to eliminate the scourge from schools.
Berrafato wrote an essay entitled "Fifth Graders of the Nation Unite Against Homework" for a class assignment, and sent a copy to the New York Daily News. His manifesto appeared in the newspaper, popped up all over the internet, and eventually landed in the lap of Katie Couric's CBS Evening News last week. Not too shabby for a rant about something so obvious.
We congratulate young Berrafato for using the power of newspapers to promote his ideas. And in a blatant effort to mimic his success, we offer you, loyal SparkNotes readers, possible essay titles, so that you too, can make a difference. Choose any of the following, write 1,000 words on the topic, then sit back and wait for Ms. Couric's call:
"Tests are Dumb"
"The Video We Watched in Social Studies Taught Us Nothing"
"A Three-Day School Week Would be Sweet"
"Ninth Graders of the Nation Unite Against Having Another Stupid Candy Sale"
"Ice Cream is an Acceptable Dinner"
"Girls Should Like Me Because I'm Really Good and Funny"
"Trig Sucks and It's Not Like We're Ever Going to Use It"
"First Period Gym Class? Eww!"
"Eleventh Graders of the Nation Unite Against Not Being Able to Park in the B-Lot, Which Is So Much Closer to School than the Stupid C-Lot"
"Four Minutes Between Classes Just Isn't Enough"
"I Hate Those Smelly Black Tables in all of the Science Labs"
"Call of Duty 4 is better than Halo 3. This is Not Open for Debate."
"I Like Field Trips"
"The French Students Always Win the Foreign Language Bakeoff"
"Why Does The Physics Class Get to Go to Great Adventure? Boooo!"
"Today Should Have Been a Snow Day"
"School Starts Too Early"
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