OK, so a few confessions before I tell you about what I thought about X-Men 3: The Last Stand. I was a mildly obsessive comic book collector during my adolescent years. I also went and saw the first two X-Men movies on opening night, and, delirious with joy, shelled out ten bucks to see them each a few more times in the theater before eventually snatching up the DVDs. During college, I celebrated the conclusion of every exam period by gorging my crispy, Shakespeare-added brain on X-Men back issues from the slightly seedy comic book store down the street from my apartment.
Oh, TV, you kill me. You do this to me every season. Your glittery promos draw me in like a moth to the light and—ZAP!—just like that you’ve got me hooked on your shows. Now, it’s bad enough that you keep me preoccupied all season long, making me rearrange my schedule so I won’t miss my shows, or making my VCR work overtime. But to tease me with cliffhangers? That’s just plain wrong.
I was recently reading over the Billboard charts and I realized that, despite the fact that I write about music for a living, I did not own any of the first fifty songs on the Billboard Hot 100. I asked around and none of my friends owned any of these records either.
I was shocked. Does that make me out of touch with what people are actually listening to? Maybe I’m just a snob, after all, looking at that chart, I did feel a sickening disappointment at the blandness of what people are buying. But I realized that, despite the growth of music on the Internet, it’s hard to discover new artists when you don’t work in the industry. You don’t know if you are going to like something or if a certain artist will fit in with the rest of your record collection.
This is a momentous occasion of sorts… not only is this the 30th anniversary of the OCD (OK, I’ve missed a few episodes here and there; it’s not exact, yes, but work with me, people), but also the writers went and killed off Marissa Cooper. What does this mean for the OC? you’re probably asking yourself, as you tear out multiple strands of hair (I sort of slouched over and had my hand on my forehead as it all went down). You want my opinion? This is the BEST thing the writers may have ever done for the show and the single WORST thing Mischa Barton ever did for her career. I mean, we can assume that it was her decision to leave the show, right? She’s probably going on to bigger and better things. Like a third installment of I Know What You Did Last Summer or playing a human toothpick, alongside Lindsay Lohan and Nicole Richie. I can see it now: Mischa Barton, the pop album. Groan. That’s what usually happens. Look at Jennifer Love Hewitt. She was popular in Japan.
America, how are you doing? Are you all okay? It’s been tough, I know. It’s okay to cry—its just part of the healing process. In a few days, you will start to feel better and be back to your normal selves. Okay, okay, I’ll cut out the dramatics, but don’t pretend you didn’t know I was talking about the sudden departure of Chris from American Idol.
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