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Posts by valerie burn

A New Chicken Dance Is Upon Us and It Is Worse Than Ever

By Valerie BurnNovember 13, 2014
SPARKLETOTS: If you're anything like us, lately, something's been missing from your lives. With all the Taylor Swift and Sam Smith going around, our ear drums have been positively coddled with nice songs and pleasing music. But you know as well as we do: Listening to ... More  →
A New Chicken Dance Is Upon Us and It Is Worse Than Ever

"Ol' McSpaghetti Arms" and Other Things Anna Kendrick Says In Her Awesome Marie Claire Interview

By Valerie BurnNovember 12, 2014
When we talk about our imaginary best friends, a few ladies come to mind: Jennifer Lawrence. Emma Watson. Taylor Swift. Hillary Clinton. (Is that last one just me? OK.) But we often forget one of our most excellent fake besties, Ms. Anna Kendrick. We first met her ... More  →
Marie Claire Interview" />

Mindy Kaling Mistaken for Malala Yousafzai Because Life Is Weird

By Valerie BurnOctober 28, 2014
Stars: They're just like us! They get mistaken for Nobel Peace-prize winning teenagers who have been shot in the face by the Taliban. Mindy Project star/creator/writer/everything and all-around-cool-woman Mindy Kaling was recently at an event. A reporter was following her around, as reporters are wont to do, and ... More  →
Mindy Kaling Mistaken for Malala Yousafzai Because Life Is Weird

Science News: Ghosts Aren't Real, Probably

By Valerie BurnOctober 14, 2014
For something with no scientific proof whatsoever, ghosts are overwhelmingly believed in and prevalent in our culture. Polls say about 37 percent of Americans believe in ghosts. That's probably higher than the percentage of Americans that can name the Vice President.* What we mean is, that's a lot ... More  →
Science News: Ghosts Aren't Real, Probably

Censorship Fail: School Bans Seven Books, Students Get Books Un-Banned

By Valerie BurnOctober 13, 2014
A high school in Texas just un-banned seven books from the library and classroom instruction, which were initially banned over concerns about references to sex, abortion, rape, and other HIGHLY OBJECTIONABLE CONTENT. Highland Park ISD originally "suspended" the books after pressure from a group of parents ... More  →
Censorship Fail: School Bans Seven Books, Students Get Books Un-Banned

Tween Pens Scathing Letter to Sporting Goods Chain Because, Shockingly, Girls Play Sports, Too

By Valerie BurnOctober 10, 2014
Sit down and think about the people you know who participate in sports—football, soccer, tennis, volleyball, basketball, and countless others. None of them are girls, right? WRONG, obviously. Probably a lot of them are girls, because, especially through high school, boys' and girls' organized sports participation is ... More  →
Tween Pens Scathing Letter to Sporting Goods Chain Because, Shockingly, Girls Play Sports, Too

The Green Lantern and Gossip Girl Are Cooking a Baby

By Valerie BurnOctober 8, 2014
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND READ THIS INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT BABY GESTATION NEWS ALERT: Ryan Reynolds, of Green Lantern and Van Wilder and Definitely, Maybe (this author's absolute favorite) fame, and Blake Lively, of Gossip Girl and Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants fame, have created a zygote-fetus-thing (SCIENCE!). These two beautiful people have ... More  →
The Green Lantern and Gossip Girl Are Cooking a Baby

Taylor Swift Out-Memes Tumblr

By Valerie BurnOctober 2, 2014
If you use Tumblr, you've probably seen this meme about a girl named Becky that died of a "marijuana overdose." Image c/o Tumblr Of course, it's not a girl named Becky and she didn't die of anything, alleged marijuana overdose or not. It's a pic of our ... More  →
Taylor Swift Out-Memes Tumblr

Magical Fairy Princess Cake is Real and Edible and We Need It

By Valerie BurnOctober 1, 2014
Today in NECESSARY MAGICAL EDIBLE THINGS news, Disney made a magical cake with a video of magical things on it. No, really, check it out yourself: The video really doesn't do this feat in cake technology justice. Despite the amazing images, something about the idle chatter in ... More  →
Magical Fairy Princess Cake is Real and Edible and We Need It

Our Bestie JLaw is Dating WHO?!

By Valerie BurnOctober 1, 2014
We don't post a ton of celeb gossip up in here, because 1) a lot of it is untrue, 2) a lot of it is boring, and 3) it's none of our business. But all that HIGH ROAD NONSENSE goes out the window when it comes to ... More  →
Our Bestie JLaw is Dating WHO?!
About the Author
Valerie Burn

Valerie Burn is a very cool Midwestern lady. She has lived in tons of exciting places, such as Wisconsin, Illinois, Minnesota, and Michigan. She spends her free time snuggling her beautiful, perfect dog Teddy, and reading the entire internet every day. Valerie enjoys eating things, buying things, and writing things, as well as watching terrible TV.

Wanna contact a writer or editor? Email contribute@sparknotes.com.