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Posts by jon_skindzier

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Ask Jono: Relationships, From Start To Makeout

By Jon_SkindzierFebruary 11, 2011
Dear Jono, I am a junior in high school and have never had a boyfriend. Ever. One thing that always happens to me when I am around a cute guy or a guy I like is that I can start to act weird, hyper or extremely ... More  →
Ask Jono: Relationships, From Start To Makeout

Ways Your Body Ruins Everything

By Jon_SkindzierFebruary 8, 2011
Your body is pretty good at some stuff, such as developing from a baby into an adult, moving around on two legs, and converting a taco into life-sustaining energy. Unfortunately, it's also pretty stupid, in that it doesn't understand exactly what you want it to ... More  →
Ways Your Body Ruins Everything

How To Throw an Ironic Super Bowl Party

By Jon_SkindzierFebruary 3, 2011
The most-watched event in America is coming up, which by hipster standards already makes it worse than falling face-first into a pile of snakes. But what could be more ironic than a lazy "party" that "supports" the very thing you despise? (The Super Bowl, that ... More  →
How To Throw an Ironic Super Bowl Party

Ask Jono: Valentine's Day Gifts!

By Jon_SkindzierFebruary 1, 2011
Hi Jono, Valentines is coming up this is my first having a boyfriend. So my question is, what do I do? Are girls supposed to get something for the guy? If yes, then what? Dear Jono, Valentine's Day is coming up, and I was wondering if you had any ... More  →
Ask Jono: Valentine's Day Gifts!

Terrible Ways To Ask Someone To Be Your Valentine

By Jon_SkindzierJanuary 27, 2011
There are tons of great ways to ask someone to be your Valentine. Foremost among them is actually asking the person, with minimal trickery, and without assuming you need to play a guitar or break a bunch of laws. As long as you can say ... More  →
Terrible Ways To Ask Someone To Be Your Valentine

Ask Jono: Dudes Feeling Feelings

By Jon_SkindzierJanuary 25, 2011
Wow, guys. I thought I was going to get, like, two questions, including the one I sent myself about where I put my keys. I got a bunch though! If I didn't get to you today, it's because your question was bad and you are ... More  →
Ask Jono: Dudes Feeling Feelings

How To Be a Facebook Iconoclast

By Jon_SkindzierJanuary 24, 2011
If you're a diligent hipster, you probably barely use Facebook as it is, except to register your approval of bands so indie that they have yet to play any music. But if you're true to the vague hipster code—or even if you've merely begun to ... More  →
How To Be a Facebook Iconoclast

New Series Alert: Ask Jono

By Jon_SkindzierJanuary 19, 2011
You Sparklers have been asking for a male advice columnist to complement Auntie for, like, ever. So here he is, your very own Jon Skindzier, advice-giver extraordinaire! —Sparkitors Hi, everybody. I'm Jon, a human on the internet, and this is my new advice column, which I ... More  →
New Series Alert: Ask Jono

Football Terms, And How Not To Use Them

By Jon_SkindzierJanuary 13, 2011
The NFL playoff season is underway, which for some people means weeks of tension and excitement, and for others, confusion and dismay. ("Oh nooo! My team made it to The Big Game, whichever one that is. I hope they score so many footballs that nobody ... More  →
Football Terms, And How Not To Use Them

One-Hour Christmas Cleanup

By Jon_SkindzierDecember 29, 2010
Christmas is great and all, but after it's over, your house is full of stuff that suddenly has no use whatsoever. There's a tree in your living room, which in July would be cause to call an emergency lumberjack, and you now own a bunch ... More  →
One-Hour Christmas Cleanup