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Posts by chelsea dagger

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The Top 10 Things You'll Learn at Your First Job

By Chelsea DaggerNovember 19, 2009
Unless you’re an inexplicably wealthy vampire, Paris Hilton, or a wildly successful freelance writer earning a cool six bucks a week, chances are you’re gonna have to get a job. And since you’re in high school and have no real skills to speak of, ... More  →
The Top 10 Things You'll Learn at Your First Job

Dagger University: Get Your Nose on that Grindstone, Cowboy

By Chelsea DaggerNovember 17, 2009
Dear Dagger, I'm not sure if this is going to be the kind of problem that you were expecting to be asked, but I am currently facing a problem of not having enough motivation to do my work in school anymore. I am a ... More  →
Dagger University: Get Your Nose on that Grindstone, Cowboy

I've Got A Crush on You (and I Will Stalk You Until You Marry Me)

By Chelsea DaggerNovember 16, 2009
You may remember a series we published a few weeks back called Unrequited Love is Awesome, in which we pummeled you with advice on how to win the gooey heart of your crush, ooze sex appeal while surrounded by meatloaf, and become the least-respected ... More  →
I've Got A Crush on You (and I Will Stalk You Until You Marry Me)

Dagger University: The Best Worst Years of Your Life

By Chelsea DaggerNovember 10, 2009
This is the scenario. It is Friday night. It is your first week of college. It is 7:43 pm. You are alone in your dorm room, and you are some combination of the following: nauseous ever so lonesome paralyzed by a sense of imminent doom covered ... More  →
Dagger University: The Best Worst Years of Your Life

How to Fail at Everything

By Chelsea DaggerNovember 6, 2009
Sparklers, you may not know this, but we're experts at failure. Below are some lessons we learned the hard way. How to Fail at Driving: While backing out of your driveway, calmly look into your rear view mirror and confirm that the coast is clear. Then ... More  →
How to Fail at Everything

Humiliation 101: How to Embarrass Yourself Like a Champion

By Chelsea DaggerNovember 4, 2009
If you’re a person, and you’re in high school, chances are you’ve embarrassed yourself before. In fact, you’re probably embarrassing yourself right now. As we at SparkNotes have suffered our fair share of shame and degradation, we can empathize. Below are some horrifyingly uncomfortable ... More  →
Humiliation 101: How to Embarrass Yourself Like a Champion

Premiere Protocol: What to Do at the Opening of New Moon

By Chelsea DaggerOctober 30, 2009
Sparklers, prepare yourselves: November 20th is The Day of Reckoning. On this otherwise quiet Friday, New Moon, the latest installment of the Twilight saga, will explode into theaters with a blaze of scowls, whininess, and uber-intense face-touching. Since this will almost certainly be the ... More  →
Premiere Protocol: What to Do at the Opening of New Moon

What Your SparkNotes Nickname Says About You

By Chelsea DaggerOctober 28, 2009
You’ve all heard the phrase “A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.” In fact, you probably stumbled across it while trying to stab your eyes out with a highlighter during your English-class-enforced reading of Romeo and Juliet. But if names don’t matter, ... More  →
What Your SparkNotes Nickname Says About You

15 Fantastic Things about Fall

By Chelsea DaggerOctober 26, 2009
1. Drool Angels (just go with it.) 2. Decorative seasonal gourds—really, who doesn’t just LOVE these? 3. The unbearable prevalence of the color orange. And by unbearable, we of course mean, “totally un-annoying and potentially really spectacular, if you are color-blind.” ... More  →
15 Fantastic Things about Fall

Surviving the Swine Flu-A Step By Step Guide

By Chelsea DaggerOctober 23, 2009
Two SparkLife writers (including Chelsea_Dagger) have swine flu! Here's poor Chelsea's account of how she contracted the most annoying, albeit trendiest, illness around. —SparkNotes editors Step Negative Four—Welcome to the Jungle Chronological Placement: A few days before the flu rocks you like a hurricane. Be overtaken by an ... More  →
Surviving the Swine Flu-A Step By Step Guide
About the Author
Chelsea Dagger

Since 2010, Chelsea Dagger (known in real life as Chelsea Aaron) has been SparkLife's sweatiest editor. She's currently working on a how-to-kiss guide for teens, and when she's not conducting smooch-related research on her life-size Joseph Gordon-Levitt cardboard cutout, she's eating pancakes, stocking up on industrial-strength deodorant, and destroying everyone at Harry Potter trivia. (EXPECTO PATRONUM!)

Wanna contact a writer or editor? Email contribute@sparknotes.com.