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Posts by chelsea dagger

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There Is No Glitter Or Hairspray Left on The Planet After Last Night's Country Music Awards

By Chelsea DaggerNovember 6, 2014
Last night the 48th annual CMAs were on, and I won't lie, buttskis: I DEFINITELY DID NOT WATCH THEM. I'm not what you might call an aficionado of country music, and besides, I was too heartbroken over the Benedict Cumberbtch engagement news to do anything ... More  →
There Is No Glitter Or Hairspray Left on The Planet After Last Night's Country Music Awards

This Breaking News Will Break Your Heart: BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH IS ENGAGED!

By Chelsea DaggerNovember 5, 2014
SORRY BUTTS, but it seems the bachelor store is FRESH OUTTA CUMBERBATCH. This morning, London's The Times printed an engagement announcement for Benedelicious and his longtime girlfriend Sophie Hunter, and we have been eating our feelings ever since. (Chicken nugs smothered in fro-yo? DON'T MIND ... More  →
This Breaking News Will Break Your Heart: BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH IS ENGAGED!

President Coin Sent Me a Neckerchief and I AM NOW AN OFFICIAL MEMBER OF THE REBELLION

By Chelsea DaggerNovember 3, 2014
If you saw the above photo and thought, "Chelsea Dagger has an unusually large and radiant forehead," YOU WERE RIGHT. If you thought, "Chelsea Dagger's hair makes her look quite a bit like Ralphie from The Simpsons,"  YOU WERE RIGHT AGAIN. But if you thought ... More  →
President Coin Sent Me a Neckerchief and I AM NOW AN OFFICIAL MEMBER OF THE REBELLION
The All-Caps Style Recap SO GOOD That It Needs No Introduction

The All-Caps Style Recap SO GOOD That It Needs No Introduction!

By Chelsea DaggerOctober 31, 2014
SERIOUSLY, I'M NOT WRITING AN INTRODUCTION. THE SLIDESHOW DOESN'T NEED IT. ALSO, IT'S FRIDAY AND I HAVE MORE IMPORTANT STUFF TO DO, LIKE EAT MY WEIGHT IN CANDY CORN.  More  →

BenYÓNCE Cumberbatch, a Bulletproof Puppy, & the Adorbs Boston Bruins: The Best of the Interwebs This Week!

By Chelsea DaggerOctober 30, 2014
THE INTERNET GODS HAVE BEEN KIND TO US THIS WEEK, BUTTSKIS. Over the last few days, they've bestowed upon our noble, inordinately sweaty brows not one, not two, but THREE magnificent gifts. IT HAS BEEN A VERITABLE GIFT BONANZA. Check them all out below, then ... More  →
BenYÓNCE Cumberbatch, a Bulletproof Puppy, & the Adorbs Boston Bruins: The Best of the Interwebs This Week!
This <em>Little Mermaid</em>-Themed Wedding Is About To Make Your Disney Dreams Come True

This Little Mermaid-Themed Wedding Is About To Make Your Disney Dreams Come True

By Chelsea DaggerOctober 29, 2014
On Monday morning, as we were peeling our drool-covered retainers from our foreheads and munching exhaustedly on our breakfast fro-yo, we stumbled upon a Little Mermaid-inspired wedding shoot SO BEAUTIFUL that we could hardly believe our sleep-crusted eyes. Were these imag More  →
This ALL-CAPS STYLE RECAP Might Be The Greatest Thing You've Ever Laid Eyes Upon

This ALL-CAPS STYLE RECAP Might Be The Greatest Thing You've Ever Laid Eyes Upon

By Chelsea DaggerOctober 24, 2014
By the time you're reading this introduction, I will be high in the sky on a plane to Ohio, where I shall spend the weekend mouth-breathing into vats of cottage cheese and watching Storage Wars with my adorable grandparents. THE GLAMOUR IS OVERWHELMING. And since I have such More  →

This Morning Sucks Less Thanks to Chris Hemsworth & the Epic In The Heart of the Sea Trailer

By Chelsea DaggerOctober 21, 2014
MORNINGS ARE THE WORST. Case in point: I awoke today to find page 348 of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows stuck to my forehead (my super-glue-like drool had affixed it there after I fell asleep reading. THUS PERISHES THE ILLUSION THAT I LEAD A ... More  →
This Morning Sucks Less Thanks to Chris Hemsworth & the Epic <em>In The Heart of the Sea</em> Trailer
Ansel Elgort & Miles Teller Steam Up This Week's ALL-CAPS STYLE RECAP

Ansel Elgort & Miles Teller Steam Up This Week's ALL-CAPS STYLE RECAP

By Chelsea DaggerOctober 17, 2014
When a slideshow promises STEAM right in the title, you know one of two things must be true:1. IT IS A TRULY STEAM-TASTIC SLIDESHOW. STEAM IS AFOOT. THE AIR IS STEAMY WITH STEAMING STEAMS OF STEAM. OR 2. I couldn't think of any other way to say "LOOK AT ALL THE STRAPPING JA More  →

20 Truly Awful Nicknames That You DEFINITELY Do Not Want

By Chelsea DaggerOctober 17, 2014
BUTTS, I sit before you today a living, breathing example of the incredible transformative power that a great nickname can have. A great nickname can turn a sweaty dork who spends her days taking spectacularly humiliating nose-dives down flights of stairs into a sweaty Sparkitor who spends her days ... More  →
20 Truly Awful Nicknames That You DEFINITELY Do Not Want
About the Author
Chelsea Dagger

Since 2010, Chelsea Dagger (known in real life as Chelsea Aaron) has been SparkLife's sweatiest editor. She's currently working on a how-to-kiss guide for teens, and when she's not conducting smooch-related research on her life-size Joseph Gordon-Levitt cardboard cutout, she's eating pancakes, stocking up on industrial-strength deodorant, and destroying everyone at Harry Potter trivia. (EXPECTO PATRONUM!)

Wanna contact a writer or editor? Email contribute@sparknotes.com.