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Posts by ashley brooke roberts

Which 90s Teen Movie Are You?

By Ashley Brooke RobertsSeptember 13, 2016
The '90s are back, and no, I'm not able to explain the spaghetti straps, bike pants, or crocheted berets. You either keep an open mind about the '90s or you don't. The '90s were a fascinating time, in part because it was acceptable to wear silver lamé pants around ... More  →
Which 90s Teen Movie Are You?

The Dramatic Art of Being a Terrible Girlfriend

By Ashley Brooke RobertsMay 18, 2016
I was a bad high school girlfriend. I strung him along. I lied. I cheated. Why? I was in love with someone else, or at least I thought I was. But more importantly, I thrived on the drama my unrequited love drummed up. It made ... More  →
The Dramatic Art of Being a Terrible Girlfriend

How to Have Fun at a Party When You Don't Want to Drink

By Ashley Brooke RobertsApril 13, 2016
Oh boy, here we go. You're finally "of age," you’re at a party, and if you were worried it might be a *bit* of a boozer, the pineapple pool floats and "mystery punch" confirmed your worst fears. Even so, you have no intention of drinking. You want to ... More  →
How to Have Fun at a Party When You Don't Want to Drink

Why Everyone Deserves Siblings

By Ashley Brooke RobertsMarch 29, 2016
Being an only child stinks. People try to romanticize it—you are the apple of your parents' eye! What are siblings but a backup plan?—but I'm calling b.s. Sure, there are some perks, but the positives don’t outweigh the negatives. Disagree? Well, you’re wrong! Sorry, I usually ... More  →
Why Everyone Deserves Siblings

20 Pieces of Life Advice From Luna Lovegood

By Ashley Brooke RobertsMarch 22, 2016
“The girl gave off an aura of distinct dottiness. Perhaps it was the fact that she had stuck her wand behind her left ear for safekeeping, or that she had chosen to wear a necklace of Butterbeer caps, or that she was reading a magazine ... More  →
20 Pieces of Life Advice From Luna Lovegood

The 23 Best Places To Have Deep Thoughts

By Ashley Brooke RobertsSeptember 29, 2015
Deep thoughts can be seriously disruptive. Some are heralded with trumpets, some with a crack of lightning, some with Earth-melting fury. Whatever the revelation, if it happens at Starbucks, you're going to attract a lot of attention... YouTube/Paramount Pictures "HEY DO YOU WANT A SPICED APPLE CIDER ... More  →
The 23 Best Places To Have Deep Thoughts

6 Podcasts You Should Be Listening To Right Now

By Ashley Brooke RobertsSeptember 24, 2015
When it comes to podcasts, I prefer the original podcast: talking to myself. But sometimes even that gets boring, and I think, “I want something NEW to stuff my ears with!” Thankfully, among my friends, hosting podcasts and listening to podcasts are pretty much the ... More  →
6 Podcasts You Should Be Listening To Right Now

Toddler Terrified of Her Shadow Embodies Our Freudian Angst

By Ashley Brooke RobertsSeptember 16, 2015
Life is cruel. One minute you’re goo-goo-ing and gah-gah-ing all over town, and the next you’re faced with the Sisyphean task of self-actualization and/or your first spiritual heartbreak. Why the sudden existential crisis, you ask? Did I just get out of therapy? Did I watch ... More  →
Toddler Terrified of Her Shadow Embodies Our Freudian Angst

What I Learned at Comedy Summer Camp

By Ashley Brooke RobertsSeptember 15, 2015
While you were swimming in lakes and "keeping up" with sundry Kardashians this summer, I was in a basement teaching 10-13 year-olds improv and stand-up at a comedy summer camp. A comedy. summer. camp. (Have you suddenly been struck by the feeling that you did childhood ... More  →
What I Learned at Comedy Summer Camp

Career Guide: How to Become an Artisanal Pencil Sharpener

By Ashley Brooke RobertsSeptember 9, 2015
Looking for a dream career? Want to apprentice someone with true vision? Let us introduce you to illustrious artisanal pencil sharpening pioneer David Rees. Real person and host of Going Deep with David Rees on the National Geographic channel, David Rees charges $40.00 per "manually" sharpened ... More  →
Career Guide: How to Become an Artisanal Pencil Sharpener
About the Author
Ashley Brooke Roberts

Ashley Brooke Roberts is a stand-up comedian, writer, and actor living in Brooklyn. She's a performer at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theater and can usually be found smiling at random dogs on the street. Follow her on twitter at @AshleyBRoberts.

Wanna contact a writer or editor? Email contribute@sparknotes.com.