Do Guys Want Girls to Make the First Move?

Open Road Films


You already have an idea of how dating is "supposed" to go: the guy asks you out, you go on a date, the guy initiates romantic contact, and then soon you are married and have so many beautiful babies that they're tumbling out of your cupboards, getting misplaced under the couch, etc. Or, if the guy is super bad at it, he walks up to you and says "Hey, are those Space Pants? Because your butt takes up a great deal of space," and then he is slapped by you, and he goes away.

Either way, though, the general consensus is that most steps in the process are initiated by the guy. So what happens if the guy isn't initiating anything? Can the girl make the first move? What even is a first move? How does a girl kiss a guy without being arrested by the government?

Traditionally, these weren't questions that anyone had to worry about, because the guy was always supposed to initiate everything, and that was that. You'll still see occasional studies saying that guys prefer to do the asking and girls prefer to be asked. But once upon a time, as a girl, the only thing you were allowed to do was sit imprisoned in your dad's castle, sending out flirtations via indentured servants, who would probably just get eaten by dragons. Traditions change, sometimes very quickly. And on top of that, there are also studies saying that other guys love it when the girl makes the first move, which cancels out that first study and leaves us just where we started: confused, and eating pop tarts in our pajamas. (I can only speak for myself here.)

So, how do guys feel about girls making the first move? The short answer is: it depends on the guy, and it depends on the move. The long answer is... well, the rest of this slideshow.

Topics: Life
Tags: flirting, crushes, confidence, how to flirt, dating advice, gender roles, gender stereotypes, flirting while awkward, exit pursued by a girl

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