Search Menu
Menu

Dating With Science: Are Guys Threatened By Smart Girls?

Warner Bros/Harry Potter

Credit:

To some extent, this finding is just the patriarchy yet again rearing its ugly head, and then peeling out of the parking lot in its Confederate flag monster truck. Guys sometimes (perhaps subconsciously) believe that they are supposed to be Good and Big and Strong, and that they've failed at this when a woman is demonstrably better than they are at something. This is dumb, obviously, but the good news is that they don't necessarily think this way on purpose, and even if they do, those attitudes are disappearing; for example, guys used to be uncomfortable with the thought of a wife who earned more than they did, but they no longer care about this. Marriages in which the woman was more educated than the guy used to be more divorce-prone, but nowadays those marriages are actually happier. So if you're a smart girl who wants to ask a guy out, if you can start out by already being married to him, that would be ideal.

In the short term, though, try to be aware how you come across in your interactions with guys. If you're dealing with the kind of guy who is literally repelled by a smarter woman, they you shouldn't want anything to do with him anyway, and he should, in my professional opinion, throw himself into a bog and sink slowly to the bottom.

If you're dealing with the kind of guy who is literally repelled by a smarter woman, they you shouldn't want anything to do with him anyway, and he should, in my professional opinion, throw himself into a bog and sink slowly to the bottom. If you're a smart person who feels compelled to continually beat others about the face with your superior knowledge on all of the subjects, then maybe administer this beating a bit more subtly while wooing a boy. After all, the cornerstone of good dating conversation is curiosity about the other person rather than focusing on yourself, so your attention should be focused outward rather than inward anyway.

Please let me reiterate this: being smart and capable are unequivocally positive things, and if I told you to hide those things, then my editor would fire me, in a kiln, like a piece of pottery, and deservedly so. Never hide who you are just to please the male-o-centric male-ocracy. You should look for—and will find—guys who love your intelligence and don't feel one bit threatened or diminished by it. But while you're doing that, try not to sabotage potential relationships by interrupting your crush in the middle of a sentence and screaming the first 200 digits of pi, or rubbing his face in your perfect SAT scores by literally taking his face and smashing it into that paper upon which your scores are printed. And try to look for romance in people who are as smart as you are; ultimately, we're attracted to people who are like ourselves, and this is never more true than it is with brains.

Have you ever felt like you needed to hide your intelligence to get your crush to like you? Did you quickly come to the realization that said crush was a dunderhead and you'd be better off with that handsome NASA physicist anyway? GOOD. 

Topics: Life
Tags: relationships, flirting, dating, crushes, how to flirt, dating with science, dos and don'ts of flirting, ron weasley responds with a resounding "no"

Write your own comment!