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August Horoscopes!

Taurus (April 20 – May 20)

Make sure you have all your ducks in a row, Taurus, because they look cute like that, and there is really no other point to this flock of ducks whose purchase you are probably beginning to regret. Your Romance Fact is that three minutes of kissing will burn the number of calories contained in a postage stamp (6). If you kiss a postage stamp for 3 minutes, nothing will happen, but you will develop a new kind of embarrassment that is very mild but will never go away.

Topics: Life
Tags: astrology, horoscopes, zodiac, the future, zodiac signs, future predictions, astrological signs, you're going to suffer but you're going to be happy about it

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