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August Horoscopes!

Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)

Be on the lookout for omens this month, Aquarius, but pay absolutely no attention to portents. Be suspicious of signs and auguries, unless the signs say WIDE LOAD, in which case it is permissible to laugh at them. Your Romance Fact is that love is a series of processes located mostly in the amygdala; if you were to kiss your crush on this part of the brain, you would almost definitely be going to prison.

Topics: Life
Tags: astrology, horoscopes, zodiac, the future, zodiac signs, future predictions, astrological signs, you're going to suffer but you're going to be happy about it

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