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My Dream Period Tracker App

My Dream Period Tracker App

By Janet Manley

Hey Sparklers! Let's talk period tracker apps! I have a bushel of apps myself, because they are FREEEEE and I love apps. The point of them, if you don't have one, is to make it easy to record symptoms (moodiness, acne, headaches, cramps, the insuppressable urge to do a jig) throughout your menstrual cycle and maybe, just maybe, figure out what your cycle is (it will take me another hundred years to figure this out). You can set the apps to give you alerts ("Flow coming!") and remind you to drink water or take your iron tablets or whatever (vegetarians represent!).

Here are a few of the most common apps (My Pink Pad Tracker, Glow, Period Tracker!):

They look fun, right?! They're like cellphone games where you always win! Hang on for one month and you automatically move to the next level!

My favorite part of them is recording my "mood" for the day, using a given emoticon. Nothing like hand-picking "melancholy" or "frightening levels of joy" from a pre-existing list and logging it.

Of the apps, Glow is a bit more old-persony, and Pink Pad is my favorite, but if I had a million dollars, I would build my own, called "Janet's Shark Week Tracker" in less girly colors. It would be decorated with relevant paraphernalia like unicorns, vomiting cats, talking carrots, carbs, the ghosts of periods past, and the all-important shark, to let me know the waters are dangerous. It would look something like this:

The options for "today's mood" would be:

  • Hungry for English muffins :D O
  • Happy but itchy *.I
  • Wanted to sing out loud like nobody could hear it   -o-
  • Swung around a light pole (I)
  • Felt like I had a watermelon in my belly  (O)
  • Lazy and only good for beanbags __
  • Quietly content :,
  • Hungry for bananas and banana-flavored products :))
  • Angry and pointy >:

When it comes time for "flow" to start, the alert would be as follows:

The app would then provide you with helpful period advice such as:

"Eat as much corn as you like!"

"Who says you can't use two body pillows!"

"It's okay to go jogging in a muu-muu!"

BE STRAIGHT WITH ME, SHOULD I INVEST MY MILLIONS IN THIS APP?

Do you use a period tracker? Which one do you like?

Topics: Life, Advice
Tags: sparklers, apps, sharks, periods, lady stuff, cellphone games, games you can win

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About the Author
Janet Manley

Janet's desk was moved into the hall for the duration of coursework on Roman numerals in grade four, and she cannot tell one Rocky from another to this day. Her spirit animal is a wombat, and she has not written a novel. Dauntless, Gryffindor, Mockingjay. She tweets @janetmanley

Wanna contact a writer or editor? Email contribute@sparknotes.com.