Halloween is right around the corner and everyone is clamoring for a costume! What to be? A sexy cat! Superman! A sexy pumpkin! Ideally, you want be something cozy and comfortable. So, here's a few ideas for Halloween costumes that fit over your coat!
Go as an eskimo. Be roughly authentic in a warm coat, fur hat and boots. For maximum comfort, carry around a cooked fish. That way you're not cold or hungry.
An warm choice is a sumo wrestler. Hold your own on the wrestling matt in something big enough to fit a small dog, treasure chest, or another person. The inside of a sumo wrestler costume should provide the trunk space of a Kia Optima.
Be a doctor. The white lab coat should be large and loose enough to fit over any outfit. You can probably fit a wool hat inside your surgeon's cap for added warmth. And, if it's really freezing, keep a habanero pepper in your mouth and hide it behind a surgical mask.
Be an astronaut. An astronaut's outfit must be able to withstand the freezing temperatures of outer space, so it should definitely be able to handle late-October in Minnesota. It's warmer than other costumes because it's most likely a one-piece. So, air is trapped inside and can't leave. Which is metaphor in itself, because once you're an astronaut there is no getting out. That might be the mob. Okay, looked it up, it's definitely the mob.
A ghost is a fine option for a costume that fits over your coat. It's the simplest of all the Halloween costumes. Grab a bed sheet, poke a few holes for sight and drape it over whatever you're wearing. Make sure to use a white sheet, otherwise people will just think you're a sheet.
This year for Halloween go as a Sunday morning Dad. Wear a pair of pajama pants, an ill-fitting robe and house slippers. The robe should easily fit over your coat. Next you will want to separate yourself from just being any guy in a robe. Walk around with a crumpled newspaper and complain about no one getting your jokes to anyone who'll listen.
Go as a gorilla. They don't make slim-fitting gorilla costumes, and, akin to the astronaut costume, they are typically a one-piece, so you get room to move and heat. Also, it gives you an excuse to have a bunch of bananas. Just in case your neighbors are being stingy about candy.
Dress up as Santa Claus. A Santa Claus costume is made to endure the harsh winters of the North Pole and transience of the legendary Northwest Passage. The biggest plus-side of the costume is it's made for a Big-and-Tall shopper Chris Kringle, so it can easily fit over one, maybe even two coats. Also, it comes with a fuzzy hat to keep your head toasty.
Another idea to just go as a creep. That way, you don't have to put anything over your coat, just wear shorts underneath. So it looks like you're not wearing pants.
What Halloween costume would you wear into the chill of Outer Space?