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32 Text Messages You DON'T Send to Your Ex

32 Text Messages You DON'T Send to Your Ex

By RG Daniels

Whether you've been on the giving or receiving end of a break-up, there are rules. Emotions run wild following the severing of ties. While tip-toeing through the mine field of EX-calibur, we highly recommend avoiding these text messages. One little push of the "Send" button and you might have more than you bargained for.

1. "Taking a bath, thinking of you."

2. "Look out your window, 3rd bush to the right. Hi."

3. "I was just at the zoo and it reminded me of you."

4. "I think it's good we broke up. I can focus on dating just one person now."

5. "Your best friend says hi."

6. "Still smell like onions?"

7. "Still smell like a barn?"

8. "Still smell like a garage dump on a humid day in August?"

9. "Still smell like a barn full of onions in a garbage dump on a humid day in August?"

10. "I still love you more than my booger collection."

11. "Let's get together some time and pretend I didn't plan our wedding on Pinterest."

12. "Hi Love! Can't wait to see ya!"

"Whoops, wrong #! Sorry!"

13. "I still have your books if you want 'em back. They might be a little set-on-fire, but you can still have them."

14. "My mom says she misses you. And that you were too good for me. I don't think I was supposed to repeat that second thing."

15. "My dad says he has no idea who you are."

16. "Me – You = Happiness"

17. "Oh the unlimited texts I wasted on you..."

18. "Remember when we dated? LOLZ!"

19. "Imagine if we stayed together until college? LOLZ!"

20. "WHAT were we thinking??? LOLZ!"

21. "Layin' around, listening to Taylor Swift, wishing I was in your arms, so I could break them with a baseball bat…"

22. "You were OK, I guess"

23. "Good luck in college. Remember not to mention we were together."

24. " ;) "

25. "Whatcha doooooooin'?"

26. "We don't have to do be boyfriend/girlfriend but maybe we could still kiss and hold hands and see each other five nights a week?"

27. "You've got weird ears."

28. "You've got a big head"

29. "BUTTS BUTTS BUTTS."

30. "Home with food poisoning and thinking about our time together."

31. "You can't spell 'disgusting" without 'U' and 'I'"

32. "ARF YOU (that's how say 'I still love you' in puppy language)."

Topics: Life
Tags: breakups, texting, unrequited love, awkward things, lists, text messages, breaking up, dumping

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About the Author
RG Daniels

RG Daniels is a writer living in Brooklyn, NY. He likes ‘90s one-hit wonders, breakfast for dinner, and koala bears. He is currently on Level 163 in Candy Crush.

Wanna contact a writer or editor? Email contribute@sparknotes.com.