Are you scratching your noble forehead right now, wondering what "nigh" means? THAT'S BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT READY FOR THE SATS. They are hurtling toward you like a giant, inescapable dodgeball of doom, and you, friend, do not have the reflexes, nor the vocabulary, to get out of their way.
But don't have a panic blackout just yet, SparkDarling—we've got a present for ya, and we think it's one you're REALLY going to like. You see, we've teamed up with the geniuses over at Kaplan Test Prep and figured out a way for you not only to survive the SATs, but to ace the heck outta them.
The key to your impending victory? KAPLAN CRAM SESSIONS.
They cover must-know to succeed at the test that MAY VERY WELL DECIDE THE REST OF YOUR LIFE, so if we were you (and how we wish we were, because your hair is spectacular), we'd check 'em out.
It couldn't be easier to participate: before the SATs hit you smack in the face on May 4th, simply go to www.kaptest.com/cram to register for your choice of review topics and dates. You'll not only get their top score-raising strategies and super-helpful tips for managing your time during the test, but also a day-by-day study plan to use!
DOES IT SORTA FEEL LIKE YOU JUST WON THE LOTTERY?!
You pretty much did. And it's about to get even better, because Sparklers get a 50% discount. (Insert victorious nerd hip-thrust HERE.) Just use the promo code "SPARK50" when you check out, and your cram session will be a measly $9.99.
Here are all the deets you'll need to become a SAAVY, VASTLY SUPERIOR, AND—DARE WE SAY IT?— SEXY SAT-TAKER:
If you're in need of a good, old-fashioned schooling' on MATH (aka 10 Key Strategies for a Higher Math Score), check out these cram sessions:
Saturday, April 27th: 1:30 PM EST/ 12:30 PM CT/ 10:30 AM PT
Wednesday, May 1: at 7 PM EST/ 6 PM CT / 4 PM PT
If it's CRITICAL READING (aka 10 Key Strategies for a Higher Reading Score) you're after, these sessions have your name written all over 'em:
Saturday, April 27th: 4 PM EST/ 3 PM CT/ 1 PM PT
Wednesday, May 1: at 9 PM EST/ 8 PM CT/ 6 PM PT
If none of these dates or times work for you (MY, aren't you busy and popular!), don't fret: you can pre-register now to receive the full session recording on April 30th.
Oh, and one more thing: 95% of Kaplan students got into one or more of their top college choices in 2012.*
AND BOOM GOES THE DYNAMITE.
Will you sign up for a Kaplan cram sesh? Why aren't you signing up for one RIGHT NOW?! WHAT ARE YOU STILL DOING HERE? GO, SPARKDARLING, GO!
*Based on a survey of thousands of Kaplan students and parents on 2012 applicants who were admitted to college as of May 2012.
*This post was sponsored by Kaplan!*