My Pickup Lines for the Dog Park
No one is as smart or handsome as me, but still, a dog's gotta get social. You know, social. Here are some of the lines I used to woo the only dog I'll ever love: The beautiful, fierce, and disobedient lady Jinx.
1. Need rescuing?
2. Dog heaven must be missing an angel.
3. Have your people call my people.
4. Are you tired? Because you've been running through my mind all day with a frisbee in your mouth.
5. I don't normally pick up at the park. I let my owner do it.
6. (Is that pug making goo-goo eyes at me?)
7. What say we take this discussion off-leash.
8. I'd lend you my coat, but Chivalry—the German Shepard that used to come here often—is dead.
9. That fire hydrant might be fake, but you are REAL pretty.
10. You're a great catch.
11. Girl, you are SO FETCH.
12. I must be behind on my vaccines because I am LOVESICK.
13. You just took my breath away, or my tracheal stenosis is giving me trouble again.
14. You smell like garbage and pee :D