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The Mean Girls Broadway Musical Is Happening! Here Are Two Songs

The Mean Girls Broadway Musical Is Happening! Here Are Two Songs

It's happening, it's really happening! Tina Fey is taking Mean Girls to Broadway!

Fey's husband, Jeff Richmond, who scored 30 Rock, will be writing the new Mean Girls tunes. He says it will take a few years but reassures us, "We watch Smash, so we know how it works!"

Here's what we know for sure:

  • There will be lots of songs referencing many of the Mean Girls' jokes.
  • "Fetch" will be a song. (And it will probably reprise itself.)
  • Gretchen Wieners will have a song.
  • Damian will probably have a few songs, too.
  • Means Girls the musical is not yet written.

Since it isn't written, we thought we'd help out by supplying the first two songs. DON'T WORRY, JEFF, YOU'RE WELCOME.

"Cool Mom" sung by Regina's mom Mrs. George (Amy Poehler) to the tune of "Soul Man":

Comin' to ya with a hump-day snack

Can I get you a condom? Girlfriend, I got your back.

Those cool jams you're singing, they're the bomb.

But there are no rules in this house, I'm not a regular mom.

I'm a cool mom!

I'm a cool mom!

I'm a cool mom!

I'm a cool mom!

So what's up girlies? What's the 411?

Of course there's no alcohol in this. (Why, do you want some?)

What's the hot gossip? Tell me everything.

I have a dream we'll be besties, wanna hear about your spicy flings.

I'm a cool mom!

I'm a cool mom!

I'm a cool mom!

I'm a cool mom!

Happy Hour's from 4-6!

To be young again! I'd be in all the hot, hot cliques.

I'm the coolest mom, it's my only flaw.

Goodness girls, gotta love ya.

I'm a cool mom!

I'm a cool mom!

I'm a cool mom!

I'm a cool mom!

And "This Girl Is A Liar" to the tune of "Girl On Fire," sung by Janice Ian:

She's just a girl, and she's mean.

Colder than Regina George, hard and cold like plastic.

She's backstabbing in this world, and she's a liar.

She gave Regina candy to make her fat, and that face wash was foot cream.

She came from Africa,

But she's really just a hack.

Oh, she acts so innocent and sweet,

And Damian wants his pink shirt back.

This girl is a liar.

This girl is a liar.

We're not in love with her.

This girl is a liar.

So now we want to hear your lyrics. How will the "Fetch" song go?

Topics: Life
Tags: songs, movies, music, musicals, mean girls, tina fey

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