You might think that hanging out with grandparents is boring, but think again. You should be begging your grandparents to let you party with them. Here's why...
1. Sometimes they can’t see too well. If Grandma’s vision is less than 20/20, she might not notice that you take 6 cookies instead of one at your grandmother/grandchild tea party.
2. They host things like tea parties. And craft activities. And other stuff you find yourself saying, “Wha… huh? What am I even… ahhh, whatever, LET'S DO THIS.”
3. They have cool things in their houses. An 18th century organ? Civil war-era daggers? Ancient arrowheads? It’s like a museum in there! But more fun, because you don’t have to use your library voice. In fact, if you want Grandma to hear you, don’t use your library voice.
4. They can usually cook. They didn’t microwave meals for her kids like your lazy mom does. (Kidding, moms. You have jobs, now.) So they have an arsenal of delicious delicacies that you can’t get at the grocery store. And nobody ‘cept Grandma makes them quite like she does. Plus, they usually don't care about "whole wheat" "organic" "omega-9" or other weird health food that your mom probably feeds you. They're full-fat and old-fashioned.
5. They love to feed you. Many grandparents survived the Great Depression, meaning they value food more than cats value rubber bands. They give you enough food for four people, and when before you’ve even cleaned your plate, they ask, “can I get you some more?”
6. They eat dinner at 5. That doesn’t mean you have to eat your dinner at 5, but 5 is a nice time for a snack. That’s why Taco Bell invented Fourth Meal.
7. They might give you stuff. Their baseball signed by Lou Gehrig, a beautiful little vintage ring… if you ransack their home and tell them you love all their belongings, they’re sure to give you something.
8. They will tell you embarrassing stories about your parents. Blackmail is illegal, except when grandparents are involved.
9. They have great stories. They’ve survived wars, seen ghosts, worked farms, and danced the Mashed Potato. Listen up, kids.
10. They spoil you. Did anyone ever notice that when you lose your tooth at your grandparents’ house the Tooth Fairy brings you more money? Think about itttttttt.
11. Lots of down time. They aren’t going to make you run all over the place cleaning, doing errands, etc., because all they really want is a nap. And we could all use a little naptime.
12. They say cute little things. Like “Hells Bells!” and “Let’s blow this popsicle stand!” What does that even mean? What popsicle stand? How do you blow it? Like, blow it up? Insanity!
13. They still believe in old-fashioned birthday cards. You’ve probably noticed your birthday card stash dwindles each year as tech-savvy people get lazy with e-cards. But grandparents always come through. If you’re lucky, there’s a dollar in there. And if you’re really lucky, your grandma has underlined her favorite words in the long, sappy Hallmark message.
14. They love you. Even if they’re hard on you, even if they scold you sometimes, they do. They have to.
15. They don’t get technology. And when they try to use it, what ensues is hilarious.
16. Two words: handicapped parking. Old people really know how to live, in some ways.
17. You’ll understand yourself (and your parents) a little more. Is your grandmother going bald? Does your grandpa have diabetes? Do they both have horrible tempers? Take notes. It’s like you’re looking into a crystal ball!
18. Retirement communities and senior centers can be fun. BINGO! You can probably beat them all and win a prize! Even if it's denture cleaner, beating people at their own game can feel very rewarding.
19. They make super travel companions. Not that happens every day to everyone, but I have heard of grandparents with a little extra money floating around that take their grandkids on cruises and stuff. Those cruises with the huge dinner buffets! All you have to do is show up and be their grandkid and you can get a free ride to the Galapagos Islands!
20. They’re incredibly smart and interesting. They have lived in a world that you’ve never seen. Not to sound preachy, but they didn’t even have the internet when they were your age! Ask them questions. They’ll love it, and being inquisitive will make you a better and more interesting person, too.
Why are your grandparents the best?