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Skiing Versus Snowboarding: Which Is King of the Sliding Sports?

Skiing Versus Snowboarding: Which Is King of the Sliding Sports?

By Janet Manley

You're going on a school trip or family vacay to the Rockies! BUT, should you rent a snowboard or skis? Is snowboarding cooler? Is skiing more difficult? (Yes and yes.) More importantly, which one allows you to zoom around shamelessly with a portable boot heater all day? We dive into the pros and cons:
  • Snowboarding has tastier tricks (on the menu: a pop tart, chicken salad, or beef carpaccio).
  • Skiing has tastier instructor names (if you like Hans-on lessons).
  • Skiing has tight pants and isn’t afraid to show it.
  • Snowboarding has its butt hanging out, and isn't afraid to show it.
  • Famous snowboarders include Cameron Diaz, Sean White, and unsuspecting patio furniture.
  • Famous skiers include Kate Hudson, Robert Redford, and Robert Redford's Dale of Norway sweater.
  • Ski boots have rear entry, aka, hello, a FIRE ESCAPE for the hottest skiers.
  • It's easier to ride a T-bar on skis. It's easier to not knacker yourself in the terrain park on a snowboard.
  • Snowboarders spend half their day sitting on their butts in the snow. Skiers spend half their day in turtlenecks.
  • A popular snowboarding maneuver is the “scorpion,” where you fall forward on your stomach and hit yourself in the back of the head with your own snowboard.
  • A popular skiing maneuver is the "Arizonan," where an out-of-towner is burned to a crisp red between the goggles and hat by the sun.
  • Skier right-of-way implies that you give way to anyone in front of you.
  • Snowboard right-of-way implies that you are King Right, and you are boarding down King’s Way.
  • Snowboarding is a sister sport to surfing.
  • Skiing is a sister sport to fondue eating.
  • Skiing is old, like pickles.
  • Snowboarding is new, like cucumbers.
  • Snowboard boots are more comfy than ski boots.
  • Snowboarders will never forgive you for wearing a portable boot heater. (Skiers will be able to tell you the best model.)
  • Snowboards can be awkward on chairlifts.
  • Skis can be awkward in family photos.
  • Snowboarders can become confused by "Tips up!" signs on chairlifts (because WHICH TIP?!)
  • Skiers can become confused by "black run" signs (because I HAVEN’T EARNED MY BLACK BELT YET!)
  • Snowboarders shred.
  • Skiers boop-de-boop.
  • Skiers have POLES.
  • Snowboarders don't have POLES, yo.
  • Skiing is NEONNEONNEONNEONNEONNEON!
  • Snowboarding is...

P L A I D
L A I D P
A I D P L
I D P L A
D P L A I

  • But turkey chilli tastes just as good whether you’re a skier or snowboarder.

And the winner is …

SKIING! If you don’t like your knees very much.
SNOWBOARDING! If you think butts should hang free.

What is the word on the great ski divide, Sparklers?

Topics: Life
Tags: skiing, winter sports, snowboarding, pros and cons

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About the Author
Janet Manley

Janet's desk was moved into the hall for the duration of coursework on Roman numerals in grade four, and she cannot tell one Rocky from another to this day. Her spirit animal is a wombat, and she has not written a novel. Dauntless, Gryffindor, Mockingjay. She tweets @janetmanley

Wanna contact a writer or editor? Email contribute@sparknotes.com.