You made it! It’s Friday! We did it! Congratulations to all of us! Great job! Here are 25 fantastic reasons to celebrate this greatest day of the year (so far)!
1. The week is over! And what a miserable, lousy, no-good, rotten, algebra, awful week it was. Death to this week! (And yes, I did write reasons why the other days of the week were totally awesome, but I only wrote those to help hide the pain.)
2. The People’s Choice Awards, Critic’s Choice Awards, the Golden Globes, the Oscars...it’s like the Olympics of rich, unathletic famous people!
3. If you want to send Mark Zuckerberg a message on Facebook, it costs $100. What a rip off! Facebook is being stupid. Will this new monetization be the end of Facebook? Will we all stop using it? Let me know by sending me a message on Facebook.
4. 15 million copies of Minecraft have been sold. 10 years ago when that mystical gypsy told us there would soon be an ugly-looking game about digging and working that everyone loved, we just laughed and shoved the gypsy to the side. Sorry. We were wrong.
5. Song of the Day: This one! It’s so...real! It will change everything about your life.
6. Seriously though, let’s draw. Leeeet’s draaaaaaaw! A picture.
7. This weekend you should see all the Oscar nominated movies. Or, just lie and say you saw them all but they weren't very good and The Avengers is still the best movie of 2012.
8. Craft Idea: Fold paper until it’s better.
9. Today you should tell your friend the truth regarding the hockey game. Trust me. It’s for the best.
10. Going to the zoo this weekend? Don’t need to brag about it. It’s only a zoo. It’s not Space Camp. Just relax.
11. If you have a substitute teacher today, try out a new, fun middle name for yourself. Examples: Killer, Sunshine, or Comet-Gnome.
12. Make tonight special by pointing at everyone you’re talking to. It makes you seem important and rude.
13. Huge Important News: Norway is launching the first electric ferry!!! ARGH! That’s crazy!
14. OK. OK. Maybe this list is a little lacking in news. But it’s Friday. Instead of news items, I’m just going to list my favorite Star Wars vehicles.
15. The AT-AT, the Millennium Falcon, Slave 1, R2-D2 (you can ride on his bike like a Segway!), Speeder Bike, Darth Maul’s scooter...
16. Recipe of the Day: Make a cheese sandwich using the “bread” of ice cream sandwiches.
17. Are you still drawing? You can stop now.
18. Frost on the car in the morning means there’s a ghost nearby, possibly sitting in your car. No big deal.
19. Here are photos of a baby rhino. Everything is good now.
20. Dating Advice of the Day: Just be yourself. If love was meant to blossom between you and your crush, you shouldn’t have to change who you are. If that doesn’t work, use a birthday wish.
21. Fashion Tip: Tightrope walker balancing poles will be the hot new accessory for Spring!
22. Destiny’s Child is back! It’s great to see Beyonce, Kelly, and Number 3 reunited!
23. Word of the Day: Tomat-no. Definition: It’s not a real word yet. I just made it up. It means “People who keep reminding us that tomatoes aren’t vegetables.” Example: I really wish that Tomat-no would shut the hell up.
24. Tag! You’re it! But don’t rush out and tag someone. Enjoy this special time. You’ve earned it.
25. Quick Poll!