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10 Signs You Desperately Need a Snack

10 Signs You Desperately Need a Snack

By Melissa Albert

Your friends never take you seriously when you tell them you're literally starving, probably because you say it once every 17 minutes. But there are times when they'd be wise to guard their granola bars (and their limbs). Here are the warning signs that you're in danger of committing a snack attack:

1. Every answer on your math test is "SANDWICHES =D"

2. You just turned in a five-paragraph essay on the themes of juicy deliciousness in The Grapes of Wrath.

3. You're seriously considering your grandma's offer of the partially wrapped Werther's Original she found in her robe pocket.

4. You just stared directly at your crush for a full five minutes, before putting your face in his and whispering "You ate fries for lunch again, didn't you?"

5. You drifted off for a sec, and when you came to you were holding a bottle of BBQ sauce in one hand and a frightened live rabbit in the other.

6. While sitting in English class, you became convinced that the subject of Shakespeare's Sonnet 18 is actually the KFC Double Down.

7. The drool puddle on your desk has developed its own ecosystem, complete with starfish. Ooh, starfish!

8. Instead of replying "Here" during roll call, you stood up and shouted, "C is for cookie, that's good enough for me!"

9. Your friend's head is starting to look like a delicious chicken wing. And you're a vegetarian.

10. Your stomach's stopped with the growling and commenced with the audible begging.

How do you know when you're about to go on a snack attack? We usually start muttering "Cheez-its" to ourselves while looking hungrily at orange Post-It notes.

Topics: Life
Tags: food, snacks, funny things, funny lists

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About the Author
Melissa Albert

Melissa Albert reads books, worries about other people’s dogs (they look thirsty), and eats horrible candy for fun and profit. When not wearing her extremely tasteful Sparkitor hat, she’s an editor for the Barnes & Noble Book Blog. You can find her on Twitter @mimi_albert, or in the hot pretzel section of your local cafeteria.

Wanna contact a writer or editor? Email contribute@sparknotes.com.

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