Supposedly, at the stroke of midnight at the start of a new year, we are supposed to kiss someone. That time is coming. At, like, midnight. If you have a boyfriend or girlfriend the choice is easy: you should probably kiss him or her. If not ... we're in tricky waters, Sparklers.
I have had the fortune (or misfortune) of somehow being coupled up for every New Year's Eve since like ... 2004? Something like that. It has been a long time. This year, however, somewhat by choice and somewhat by circumstance, I am riding solo like Jason Derulo.
I am so single I do not even have plans. That is how single I am. I will probably head to two or three parties and see all my groups of friends and have a wonderful time—because I do not have any little man dragging me down, socially or romantically.
Will I be kissed at midnight? Well, my little Sparklers, that is not the question. The real question is: Do I want to be kissed at midnight? Here is the conversation I had with myself.
Yes: It's, like, something we are supposed to do.
No: You don't know where those lips have been.
Yes: It's just a kiss!
No: Until you get slapped by his girlfriend... or boyfriend...
Yes: This could be the start of something exciting!
No: Don't kid yourself, Burn.
Yes: It's doesn't need to be romantic! You can just kiss a friend on the cheek!
No: You're not making me feel better.
Yes: Why don't you just see where the night goes! Anything can happen!
No: Agreed, anything can happen. Including bad things. Including kissing that guy you hate.
Yes: BUT MAYBE HATE KISSING IS BETTER THAN NO KISSING????
No: Sigh. Get it together, Burn.
Yes: Let's just agree to disagree.
Yes: SO WE AGREE???
No: I'm not sure where you got that. Just please, please don't do anything stupid. Namely, do not kiss anyone you hate or any ex-boyfriends or anyone who has a girlfriend, or probably anyone. Please do not kiss anyone.
Yes: I politely decline your offer.
What are your New Year's plans? For those of you that are single (or partying sans-bf/gf), are you going to kiss someone at midnight?