This was a great year for movies, but it was almost impossible to see them all. With most movies being over two hours, how can you find the time? But I still want to write up a year-end "Best Of" list. Here’s a look at the Best Movies of 2012...that I haven’t seen yet. My opinion is only based on the opinions of others and the overall vibe I get from the trailers and advertisements.
10. The Hobbit: An Unexpected Jouney
Nope. Haven’t seen it yet. But it seems like a good movie, and it looks pretty. And Magneto is in it. I loved the Lord of the Rings movies, so this is probably awesome.
Why I Haven’t Seen It: I will! I just haven’t had the time. The movie is 7 days long, so a few vacation days and a sleeping bag are needed to take this Journey.
It has to be good because if you Google “Argo” and “Oscar Buzz” you get a lot of results. That means a movie is good.
Why I Haven’t Seen It: Timing is an issue. The movie was out a few months ago, but now there are only a limited amount of showtimes. Why is going to the movies so difficult!?
8. Zero Dark Thirty
If I see the movie and write a review, the review will contain the words: intense, important, tour de force, and dramatic. I know this because every review of the movie contains those words.
Why I Haven’t Seen It: Still need to see the first 29 Zero Dark movies. I’m so behind!
7. Silver Linings Playbook
Everyone is saying Bradley Cooper is amazing as a character who suffers from mental health problems. Of course, if he hadn’t first starred in movies like The Hangover and Wedding Crashers, people would say of his performance, “That dramatic actor is doing an adequate job.”
Why I Haven’t Seen It: Sparkitor Josh Perilo said it wasn’t very good. Why would he lie to me? WHY?!
6. Les Miserable
The music! The costumes! The scenery! The acting! The short sentence fragments used to describe it!
Why I Haven’t Seen It: I don’t know how to say the title without sounding pretentious. Lee’s Marbles!
5. Life of Pi
A kid and a tiger team up to find the area of a circle in this gripping tale of survival.
Why I Didn’t See It: Hate math.
4. The Perks of Being a Wallflower
I’ve heard nothing but good things about this movie which follows Hermione Granger as she visits a new school and (presumably) turns a boy into a flower using a transfiguration charm.
Why I Haven’t Seen It: I’ll rent it when it’s on DVD. I promise!
3. The Impossible
The sad story of tsunami survivors seems too real and, well, sad.
Why I Haven’t Seen It: It looks too sad. I don’t need a movie to make me cry; I just need a bucket of spiders and a funnel leading to my eyeballs.
2. The Artist
Yep, this movie came out last year, and won a thousand Academy Awards, but I still haven’t seen it. It doesn’t really count for this year, but I’m still including it as a reminder to update my Netflix queue.
Why I Haven’t Seen It: Like most of the world, I completely forgot about it.
Everyone seems to love it, but how could you hate Lincoln? He was a great president! He ended slavery, he invented beards, and with the help of Ben Franklin, discovered lightning! (Note: I was a poor history student.) It would be much harder to make a great movie about some jerk, like Mel Gibson. Let's see you make a Mel Gibson biopic, Spielberg!
Why I Haven’t Seen It: I feel like I already have seen it. And I know how it ends. (His ghost possesses the body of a panther, right?)
So what movies did I see this year?
The Top Ten Movies I Actually Did See This Year
10. The Hunger Games - It’s no Harry Potter, and I hate the ending, but it’s 7-billion times better than most books turned into movies and for that reason, I support it.
9. Chronicle - What if the Avengers were scared highschool students armed with a camera? That’s what this movie is.
8. The Raid: Redemption - The best action movie since Die Hard. There. I said it. I mean it. It’s that good. (Be warned: It’s very, very bloody.)
7. The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn: Part 2 - Just kidding. Haven’t seen it yet. It’s probably great.
6. The Master - Not for everyone (it’s long and not much happens) but if you want to see two amazing actors really earn their money, this is astonishing.
5. The Cabin in the Woods - Just watch it. Don’t read spoilers. Just watch it.
4. The Avengers/The Dark Knight Rises - It’s a tie. Let’s stop arguing about this. Both movies are great. Hulk smash! Bane punch! Audience win!
3. Skyfall - It’s The Dark Knight, but with James Bond.
2. Cloud Atlas - There is nothing else like it, and that helps make it great. Look past some of the goofy makeup and enjoy this unique movie.
1. Moonrise Kingdom - If this doesn’t make you smile, I hate you.
What did Dan get wrong?