To Kiss or Not to Kiss
I’ve been a long time lurker of Sparklife ever since a friend told me about Blogging Twilight and I spent the whole night with nothing but a jar of peanut butter, my computer and jetpacks for company. I’ve perused through all of Auntie’s advice columns, I’ve failed at so many of the hair videos that now I just stare at the screen mournfully whenever one pops up, and I’ve read through every single thing that Dan Bergstien has written, to see if I could find a reference to his address (so far, no luck, but I’m not done feeding them through the anagram solver yet). But, up until now, I’ve never had an account.
However, a few days ago, an article popped up about an NBK club, and I decided that it was time; there were some things I just had to say. On that note, let me tell you about my first kiss.
It was in Italy. I was on an exchange trip for school, and I was having the time of my life. It was nighttime, the stars were twinkling, love was in the air. I was dancing with a nice Italian boy that I’d met, and all of my other new friends were there too. Suddenly, he looked at me, and I knew what was about to happen. He leaned down. Slowly. And our lips met. It was over very fast and he let go of me as soon as it was done. “See you.” He said, and then walked away. I found out later that he’d kissed two other girls that night, and that he had a girlfriend.
My second kiss took place in a dark basement. It was cold, and there were spider webs in the corners. He was standing across from me, fidgeting with his fingers. “Well, goodnight.” He said. He leaned in, and we kissed. Just once. When we broke apart, we had identical goofy grins on our faces. I said something stupid, something that I won’t repeat because it’s too embarrassing. A year and half and many kisses later, he still makes fun of me for it.
I guess what I’m trying to say here Sparklers, is that life isn’t a fairy tale. It’s not perfect, and it’s never going to work out the way you wanted, or even the way you expected. You might not marry the first person you kiss. You might not marry the first person you fall in love with (though I’m still hopefully optimistic about that one). AND THAT’S OKAY! I’m not saying that it’s wrong to dream about those things, or that it’s wrong wait for them. But it’s the things that we experience along the road that change us, and shape our lives. We all need love, kissing, and heartbreak (yes, heartbreak) if we’re ever going to grow. Some people haven’t had these experiences yet. So what? They will. It’s all a matter of timing. Isolating people based on the life experiences they’ve had, or haven’t had, is just silly. “You can be in this group because your pet goldfish died.” “You’ve had a broken bone? Into this line please!” “You once kissed that weird kid who had braces and never blinked on a dare? Nope, sorry, you can’t come over here!”
In the end, there are just a few things I’d like everybody to keep in mind. Your first kiss may not be that earth-shattering, swoon-tastic, life-altering moment you imagined. Same goes for the second. And the third, fourth or fifth. But someday, everyone is going to find their soul mate, their other half, the Piglet to their Winnie the Pooh. And that person is going to love you for who you are, no matter how many other people you’ve kissed.
Originally published on December 17, 2012.