“It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas!” said someone in August. The Christmas season has spread well past December 25th, but it’s almost REAL Christmas! All the planning, shopping, crying, and eating will reach it’s epic finale one week from today. If you’re still not smiling, here are 25 reasons why today is almost as good as Christmas!
1. Today is a great! It just is! Arguing about it is like debating whether sandwiches taste better with potato chips crunched up inside. It’s a fact. Today is great and sandwiches taste so much better with potato chips crammed inside that it’s a wonder they don’t just come that way.
2. You can eat a sandwich with potato chips inside the bread. Eating sandwiches any other way means society is failing.
3. Gossip Girl is officially over. I’ve never seen an episode. Can someone describe every scene of every episode so I can figure out if I should watch it? Is it like Adventure Time? I like Adventure Time.
4. Channing Tatum is going to have a baby and because the world isn’t very creative it will be referred to as “Tater Tot” on the gossip sites. That’s silly. Better nickname: Just A Stupid Baby. (Babies don’t need nicknames.)
5. Pitch Perfect is on DVD and Blu-ray today. If you like Glee, but wish it starred different people and was shorter, this is the movie for you!
6. Elf Quote of the Day: “This place reminds me of Santa's Workshop! Except it smells like mushrooms and everyone looks like they want to hurt me.”
8. What happens to all those letters little kids send to Santa? They arrive at Santa’s house, where he makes lists and builds the toys. Duh. What a stupid question.
9. It’s almost Boxing Day! Squeeeeeee!!!!
10. Word of the Day: Onomatopoeia. Definition: A word that imitates the sound of a word. A sound effect word. Example: Dan tried desperately to think of a great onomatopoeia and finally settled on, “The duck went oof.”
11. On this date in 1787, New Jersey ratified the U.S. Constitution. Welcome to America, Jersey! You’re so much more than just New York’s clingy best friend.
12. It’s Christina Aguilera's birthday, and to celebrate, I spelled her name correctly on the second try! (This also counts as her Christmas present.)
13. Recipe Idea: Boil soda and see what happens.
14. Craft Idea: Use leftover boiled soda as homemade envelope glue!
15. On this date 1892, The Nutcracker premiered in Russia. It’s also the first time a child yawned and said, “Ugh. Can’t this be over yet?”
16. Dan’s Top Ten Lists of 2012!
Top Ten Numbers of 2012
5. The roman numeral D
10. Mach 48
17. Consider This: Every Christmas song lyric sounds sarcastic if you read it without singing.
18. Pandas are born with with mostly white fur. The black fur appears after a few days, as does their ability to see through walls and smell time.
19. Arachnid of the Day: This dancing spider.
20. Want to be point out the inaccuracies in the Hobbit movie? Study up by reading the helpful SparkNotes for the book. (Warning: Nitpicking movies is a great way to end a fun holiday party.)
21. Instagram will share information with its parent company Facebook. So that photo of your shoes might end up in Mark Zuckerberg’s hands! ACK!
22. Weather Report: It’s perfect weather for making carpet angels.
23. Stop believing in Christmas. If movies and TV have taught us anything, it’s that if you stop believing, a magical being will surprise you on Christmas Eve and take you on a fun adventure that will teach you a lesson. Yay!
24. Can you tell what type of cookies we’re baking, just form the smell? (Answer: Chocolate, chocolate celery!)
25. Quick Poll: