Ever since beginning an illustrious career as an internet dinosaur artist, I’ve been tweeted, messaged, emailed, and carrier pigeon-ed about Doctor Who. “Have you seen Doctor Who?” “Why don’t you watch Doctor Who?” “It gets better, I swear!” “DOCTOR WHOOOOO!!!” “Why does your face look so dumb and stupid?” (I imagine that last one has slightly less to do with Doctor Who, but only slightly.)
I kicked and screamed and dragged my feet and finally watched the first episode. And it was DUMB. And everyone berated me for not giving it a chance. So I watched the next episode. Basically DUMB. DUMB STUPID BUTT DUMB, GUYS. But you didn’t give up on me. You all collectively showed up at my house every night for 3 months and threw rocks at my window while humming the Doctor Who theme song and then told me I couldn’t sit with you anymore if I didn’t watch Doctor Who. I yelled about him not having a proper name, about the bad special effects, and about the stupid mannequins in the first episode. Then I begrudgingly sat down to watch the stupid thing and didn’t turn the TV off for the next 12 hours because OH MAH DEAH LAWDY that show is good. And here’s why you need to watch it, too.
1. It actually does get better. If you’re too impatient for the first episode, watch “Blink,” an episode from the third season. You will be terrified. You will also be hooked. You will still have nightmares.
2. David Tennant. MMMM. DAVID TENNANT. I have dreams about David Tennant. I like to sometimes imagine that David Tennant is the Doctor in real life and that one day, if I stalk him hard enough, he’ll take me to New New New New New New New New New New New New New New New New York.
3. I’m only on the beginning of the fourth season. We can watch it together! We can braid each other’s hair and tell secrets and have a pillow fight and eat 72 boxes of pizza and pass out on the living room floor together! And at three in the morning we can prank call Chelsea Dagger and she’ll be like, “GUYS, STOP CALLING ME,” and we’ll be all, “WE. ARE. THE. DALEKS! WE. WILL. EXTERMINATE!” and then we’ll ask her if her refrigerator is running.
4. Doctor who is a time-traveling alien. That means that in the same season, he meets Shakespeare AND the aliens that live at the end of the universe. If you’re a history or literature nerd, you’ll love it. If you’re a science fiction nerd, you’ll love it. If you’re inexplicably attracted to David Tennant, you’ll love it. MMMM. DAVID TENNANT.
5. Wit. Have you noticed how most of what’s on TV feature decidedly dull dialogue? Not Doctor Who. Your intelligence won’t be insulted by potty jokes here. In fact, you’ll spend most of your time under the impression that the writers of the show have vastly over-estimated your intelligence. Everything The Doctor says is both clever and way above my fifth-grade grasp of science.
6. Daleks. Cybermen. Weeping angels. The Master. The TARDIS. The Ood. Space pigs. Werewolves. The Face of Boe. CAPTAIN JACK HARKNESS!!!!!!! OH SPARKLERS, FETCH ME MY SMELLING SALTS, QUICKLY! I’M SWOONING.
We're pretty sure most of you are already obsessive Whovians, but for those of you who aren't: do you think you'll give the show a shot?