What Your Favorite Thanksgiving Food Says About You
If you're favorite food is...
Stuffing: You're kind of nuts, aren't you? Bursting with flavor and complications. And you’re sneaky—people sink their knives into turkeys and then BLAMMO, there you are, changing the whole picture. You're essential, you're fun. You're the first person people think of when they say, “We’re having a party, who simply MUST MUST MUST attend?!”
Canned Cranberry Sauce: You’re known as the weird-o in your group, and people might roll their eyes when you walk into the room (like that phony queen of the cafeteria Martha Stewart) and say, “Oh JEEZ it’s that WEIRD-O, Canned Cranberry Sauce." But what everyone is hesitant to say is that they love you. You’re like a surprise sugar rush. You are sure of yourself, you know that yes, you are weird, and you don't give a darn.
The Turkey: School can be one big popularity contest sometimes, and when it is, you’re winning. You’re the center of everyone’s attention, and people even fight to be your friend. They will take you out of the fridge again and again, and when your friends say, “you’re having lunch with turkey AGAIN?” It isn’t a bad thing.
Brussel Sprouts: You’re more mature than your classmates, and you’re maintained your maturity since you were just a tot. When you were much younger, your fabulousness was misunderstood and underappreciated. People would turn up their noses at you. (And maybe say “ew.”) But now that everyone’s a bit older, they’re sensing that you’re the awesome-sauce. Last year, one of the popular kids was like “You know who’s awesome? Brussel Sprouts.” And ever since, your popularity has been spreading like wildfire. Turkey is getting nervous, actually. And he should be.
Green Bean Casserole: You’re the non-conformist, friends with everyone. You can be an athlete one moment, then saunter over to the band kids and join their conversation, too. People might not know what to do with you at first, but once they meet you, they know that you’re they’re kind of friend. And even though you’re a little strange, all moms approve. Your best friend is...
Marshmallow Sweet Potatoes: You’re the class clown. But unlike other goofballs, you have this mature side, chock-full of vitamins. Parents will say, “Why don’t you try to be a little more like Marshmallow Sweet Potatoes?” because you’re sweet, social, and also take all AP classes. And as for your classmates? They all want to be a little more like you, too. People ask you how it is possible that someone so straight-laced could be so fun. You’re too busy having fun to answer.
Mashed Potatoes: You’re like a big teddy bear—huge, yet approachable, and everybody says "hi" as you walk down the hall. You might not be the quickest or the sharpest, but you have a huge heart, and make everyone happy. After they hang out with you, they rub their tummies and collapse into a food coma while they drool, muttering “butterrrrrr.” Wait, that is actually mashed potatoes, the food. But you’re smart enough—make a metaphor out of that one.
Dinner Rolls: You’re crucial to the school ecosystem and can pass from group to group, but you’re really kind of staying in the box. You never stand up for the underdog, or yourself. Yet people like you. Still, you’re always wishing you could be a little more daring. Every time you consider a streak in your hair or a piercing, you decide against it. But that’s because you know yourself—there's no need to experiment with stuff you know you'll dislike. That’s just how you roll.
Pie: People love you because you’re fun, sure, but you’re also a reliable sweetheart, who listens to your friends when all is said and done. You’re there for them when they’re happy, hungry, tired, or suffering from the aftermath of a terrible breakup. In that case, you always bring some ice cream along.
Turducken: You’re a complicated one, always stirring up trouble. You protested the soda ban in the cafeteria, and you were the only one to vote Libertarian in your school election. You’re a mover and shaker, yet you’ll never run for class president. You’re a vegetarian who eats chicken once a year. You laugh at inappropriate times. You’re a surprise. You’re too much for some people, but the close friends who love you just can’t get enough.
Which are you?