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15 Signs You Have A Big Old Crush On Someone

15 Signs You Have A Big Old Crush On Someone

By Lauren Passell

  • Your body is hovering between a cool 20 degrees celsi-whatever and WOAH NOW IT'S 97 annnnd back down to freezing and now you're sweating and WHAT? Is going on?
  • You dream that you asked your love interest out and they said no, and when you wake up to spend 5 days in mourning, listening to Adele songs and writing poetry before you realize it didn't actually happen.
  • Oh, I see you've thrown up on your own shoes. Excellent.
  • You dream you asked your love interest out and they said yes and you throw a huge soiree, do something nice for your little sister, and do 400 push-ups because you just can't not before you realize it didn't actually happen.
  • Your eyes are dialated. Or, you think they are. Everyone is looking at you funny for SOME reason.
  • Your heart is palpitating. You're sweating and lethargic. You're in love. Or you just downed Taco Bell Third Meal.
  • You start caring what you wear more, wondering, "Is this great white shark hat I'm wearing to the party really sexy enough?"
  • You start thinking everyone you see is your crush, even that one time you saw Barbara Walters on a rerun of The View, and that was definitely not your crush.
  • You bop around the house humming that "I've Got A Crush On You" song. And man, you used to really hate that song.
  • You ask your mom to drop you off five blocks away from the movie theater instead of one.
  • You're going garlic-free, in the event you ever have the opportunity for a random makeout sesh.
  • You go to write your English exam, and afterward you note that all you wrote is "LOVEY DOVEY LAND SWEETIE PIE CHEEKS" repeatedly—something that gets you (impressively) a D.
  • You're downing indigestion medication like there's no tomorrow, despite your new raw, organic diet. THOSE ARE BUTTERFLIES, MY MAN.
  • You get to know said butterflies so well you've named them after all US Presidents, FLOTUSes, and first children and dogs.
  • You're pretty sure your boogers are starting to form the shape of hearts.
Topics: Life
Tags: dating, crushes, awkward situations

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