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20 Things College Freshmen Are Scared Of

20 Things College Freshmen Are Scared Of

Remember how nervous you were as a high school freshman? Now, four years later, your anxiety is at an all-time high. Once again, you're going to be a freshman, but this time on a collegiate scale. Your mind is teeming with worst-case scenarios. The good news is, eventually these fears disappear, and years from now, you'll hardly remember you had them in the first place. But right this second, here are your top 20 fears:

  1. Having a hyper-sexual roommate whose bra is constantly hitting your forehead when she shacks up with yet another fraternity brother on the top bunk. Yep, she’s the Samantha of your college group.
  2. Sharing a bathroom with a floor full of strangers.
  3. Sharing a bathroom with just three other suitemates, only to realize one of them has no qualms about coming in to brush her teeth while you’re pooping.
  4. Having to shower with “shoes” to protect your feet from warts. Bet you didn’t have to do that when living with good old ma and pa, huh?
  5. Trying to navigate from a lecture hall on the south side of campus to another colossal building on the west end, without tripping on any stairs or green hills or breaking into a rank sweat. Oh yeah, and doing all this in fifteen minutes.
  6. Trying to navigate social situations by asking others, “What are your weekend plans?” without somehow nervously jumbling the sentence and inadvertently saying, “What are weekends for? Your pants?”
  7. Having social anxiety when you first walk into the dorm cafeteria and have no idea where to sit, or if you can eat angel hair pasta without looking like a slob.
  8. Gaining the freshman fifty-five after learning that your cafeteria serves unlimited ice cream and provides unrestricted access to French fries during EVERY. SINGLE. MEAL.
  9. Experiencing those weird hazing rituals that appear all too often in the news.
  10. Attending sporting events. In person. With thousands of rowdy students all dressed or war painted in team colors.
  11. Dropping one of your thongs on the floor when moving your clothes from the washer to dryer and having it end up in the hands of your creepy RA with the unibrow.
  12. Getting caught with a fake ID, even after you manage to memorize “your” birth date, astrological sign, address, and organ donor status. Hope you like jail.
  13. Living in proximity to not one, not two, but three pizza places that all deliver until 4:00 a.m.
  14. Getting locked in the library after you accidentally pass out while trying to read Middlemarch in one sitting.
  15. Explaining to people where your small hometown is located, and trying to differentiate yourself from that general population and its reputation.
  16. The first Friday night in the dorm—will you find a gigantic pack of freshmen to prowl around town with, or be forced to stay in and memorize the massive campus map you received during welcome week?
  17. Having some creepy person who Facebook friended chat you in the wee hours of the night. Isn’t that how Lifetime movies start?
  18. During the middle of the night, having a nightmare that causes you to roll off the top of the bunk and land on your wooden desk.
  19. Realizing that the comforter you spent hours agonizing over at Bed, Bath and Beyond is a bit more babyish and pink than you thought. You know your comforter is the first thing people see when they walk in your room, and wonder if you’ve committed social suicide.
  20. Having all of your new friends quickly couple off, leaving you to socialize with all of the bottom feeders at house parties where the obnoxious music makes these guys think it’s OK to grind on you.

Are you headed off to college this fall? What are you most scared of? What is truly haunting your sleep right before your first semester starts? We want to know!

Topics: Back to School
Tags: college, back to school, school, lists, fears

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Sissy is a woman/girl who lives, works and eats too much popcorn on the north side of Chicago. Bet you couldn't guess that her real name is actually not Sissy, but it's what her family likes to call her by. Also, She's loud and is very glad you can't hear her.

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