Interview with a 5-Year-Old Hair Stylist
When you're a kid, you're ambitious, and confused. You think you can be a tiger when you grow up. You think you can probably fly if you figure out which muscles to flex. And you think, "Hey, I can use scissors. Therefore, I can cut hair!"
Sadie Cohen, 5, got a brutal reality check after experimenting on her little sister (Eva, 3). The girls' dad, Jeff Cohen, interviewed the girls about what happened, and the results are adorable. Click through to hear!
Sadie: Eva! Do you wanna take your hair out of your braids? It would look more pretty, 'cause look, I did it. And then I got the idea to trim your hair.
Eva: Sadie said, "Do you want me to cut your hair?" and I said, "Yes."
Sadie: I climb up on the bathroom to get the scissors--the hair scissors—and then I just kept cut, and I start to get it ch ch ch ch...and it was, like, so, so, hard to cut! I was like, la la la la—I started at the bottom—la la la la, then I went joo joo joo joo. That's how it made the long piece and then the short piece.
Eva: So were you not even looking?
Sadie: I was looking.
Eva: She was looking, and she noticed that she cut it all the way to here. And some of it was short, and some of it was long.
Did you mean to cut off that much hair?
How much hair did you want to cut off?
Sadie: I was just trying to cut off the curls.
And why did you think she needed a haircut?
Sadie: Cause it was all the way down to her...it was almost about down to her tush! And if she grew it any longer...when she wiped her butt, her hair would, like, go into the toilet! And it would be gross.
Eva: I did not like when it was...it was almost down to my butt, and it was really itching my hips.
Did you think that you wanted a haircut?
But you told her that you wanted her to cut your hair.
Eva: Yeah, but I really wanted a haircutter to cut it.
When did you realize that something had gone wrong?
Sadie: When I was finished and I put the scissors back, I looked at her and I was like, "Uh-oh. This is bad. Bad, bad, bad."
(to Eva) Sadie told you to come downstairs and show us?
Eva: Yeah. And I said, "I got my hair cut, Mommy. Isn't it nice?" And Mama looked at it and she said [gasping noise].
Sadie: I heard yelling, Eva crying..."Sadie! Eva! What were you thinking??"
Eva: "What were you thinking to cut your hair?" I was crying, and I said, "Sadie cut my hair."
Sadie: And I told you not to.
And what did you do with the hair?
Sadie: I hid it under the radiator.
And did you think we were going to like it?
Sadie: No. I didn't know you were going to scream like that, though. Hair cutting takes, like, a lot of concentration. [Unintelligible] not to do it again. Ever again. That was really, really, really terrible, but everyone does that kind of stuff sometimes. It happens, like, once. Or twice. Or three times in every life. Or twice. I mean—or once.
What do you think about Eva's haircut now?
Sadie: It's pretty nice. I can't imagine her hair long anymore. It's been so long since I cut it.
When you were little, did you cut your sister's hair? Or your own? Or your Barbie's? Or your dog's?