Alright, it's time to get real; I don't like dog movies. I'm sorry. I never have. They always bother me slightly and fail to connect with me emotionally. Why make a movie about dogs when you can make a movie about pirates and Indians and flying kids?
Speaking of which, let's catch up on comments from last week's Peter Pan...
"I never liked this movie as a kid. It frustrated me how all the girls were crazy for Peter even despite his very jerk-like moments. Also, I'm Ojibwe, so I have to say that I was never pleased with the portrayal of the "Indians" in the movie. Although, the whole never growing up thing is pretty awesome."
"I love Peter Pan! I actually did an entire research paper on his philosophy of never growing up. Personally, I found Barrie's original story to be the best (Disney changed so much), even if the reason for writing was sad (Peter Pan likely represented Barrie's brother who died very young)."
"Peter Pan! Finally, getting into some of my favorites.
I love the original Tinkerbell, despite her somewhat frightening tendency toward evil. Still, I like her the way she was. Whenever I see the new fairy shows on Disney channel, I just get pissed off. She's too sweet. It's creepy.
Next week, Lady and the Tramp. I'M SO EXCITED! Best romance EVER!"
Really? I tend to think that most people love the romance in Lady and the Tramp because of the one spaghetti scene. I mean, other than that, they're dogs. The most romantic thing they do is touch their wet noses to each other. Eyiggh.
1. The beginning quote says "In the whole history of the world there is but one thing that money cannot buy...to wit—the wag of a dog's tail." Is this true? Because if you ask me, you CAN buy the wag of a dog's tail. Skin a dog's rear and tail and buy an animatronic motor. Then put it on a frame and hang the dog patootie on your wall! And your friends will call you The Wagster.
2. Who's the main antagonist? The rat that almost gets the baby or the dog catcher? Or the City Council, who let the dog catcher loose in the first place? (Invisible antagonists.) Or the Siamese cats?
3. Is there any dog better than a Scottish terrier? Even if his name is Jock.
4. If Lady is only six months old during most of the timeline, why does her voice sound so old? Like an old Lucille Ball.
5. Did anybody else get bored during the baby anticipation scenes? I forgot how long they spent anticipating the baby in the movie. I think I just got bored at this point. Baby showers? And all you see is everybody's feet.
6. Is it creepy to anyone else when Lady starts singing? In a few movies, Disney should have people just sing in their heads. It's much more realistic. Of course, we are watching a movie about dogs being romantic, so I guess realism is out the window.
7. Why does the baby look like a doll?
A doll whose hair was badly painted. Isn't this a newborn? How does it have so much freakin' hair? And why isn't its hair all crazy like a real newborn's?
8. Are the Siamese cats a symbol of evil?
9. How are there shadows on this wall in the middle of the day?
10. Is the beaver from Lady and the Tramp related to the gopher of Winnie the Pooh? They both whistle when they talk.
11. Why is Tramp such an adrenaline junkie? Chasing chickens. That's got to be the dog equivalent of taking the highway at 90.
12. Why would a rat attack a baby? Is there any reason for this? What would the rat do, gnaw on the baby's nose? Maybe the rat wanted a doll to beat up for his rat dojo where he trains in ratkido so he can strike back at the evil doglords.
Why Kids Should Watch This Flick: It teaches them what pets NOT to get at the store. Siamese twins? Uh-uh. Also, it shows them that a main character doesn't have to have a flashback scene to show that he's had a falling-out with people he loves. Case in point: Tramp. Obviously he's been tossed out of a home and that's why he does his whole 'bad dog' act. But they didn't need to show that, and that's the beauty of old movies.
What do you think of Lady and the Tramp?