By Chelsea Dagger Apr 19, 2012
Snow White and the Huntsman
If you can't wait to see Snow White and the Huntsman, you...
Never fully recovered from the Hobbit-sized hole left in your heart after the Lord of the Rings trilogy ended, and have been craving an epic, badass new movie to make you whole again. You are brave but vulnerable, beautiful but humble, and just a little too trusting (case in point: you tend to eat suspicious-looking poison apples that you find laying around in the dirt.)
Your personal mantra: "Who's the fairest of them all NOW, sucka?!" (to be shouted right before you upend a vat of clam chowder on the Dark Queen's head)
Your special skills: Jumping over flames in slow motion, befriending mythical woodland creatures, and burping the alphabet.
Release date: June 1