Today it is Wednesday (Wednesday), and Thursday comes afterwards. But did you know that it's been a whole year since "Friday"?
No lie! The hyper-informative, hater paste viral vid from now-14-year-old Ark Music Factory/Cloning Facility prototype Rebecca Black celebrated its first birthday last Friday. Don't memes just grow old so fast?
It is truly tragic that most of the Internet allowed this exceptional occasion to pass by unnoticed; Many netizens were otherwise occupied gouging digital pushpins into the nubile avatar of their next inexplicably offensive, instantaneously viral singing sensation selected for blood sacrifice (her name is Lana Del Rey, and she's not that bad). But we are all about giving credit where credit is due. And "Friday" is a far more ghastly affront to our refined musical sensibilities than that stinker SNL performance of "Video Games" was any day of the week (but especially Friday).
Thus, we we we so excited, we so excited to offer you the 21 following family-friendly methods for celebrating the triumphant anniversary of "Friday," or as orthodox observers refer to it, St. Internet's Harvest.
- Have your bowl
- Have cereal
- Have a quiet moment with a box of tacks and your Rebecca Black voodoo doll, which ironically took you an entire Friday night to assemble
- Meticulously list every action you perform from 7 a.m. to 11:59:59 p.m. in your Fun Fun Fun Diary
- Throw a party; invite all your friends; invite a creepy mustachioed rapper who is easily three times your age and twice your height
- Kick it in the front seat
- Kick it in the back seat
- Kick your computer screen until the noises stop
- Declare meme warfare (mad props to Wolfboy183)
- Party and
- Party and
- Practice reciting angry vlog posts to your reflection in preparation for Rebecca's upcoming 5-song EP
- Book an audition at Ark Music Factory and follow Rebecca's footsteps to viral fame—you could even be the next Devin Fox!
- Write creepy emails to Devin Fox
- Write creepy emails to Lana Del Rey (it's still in fashion)
- Write indiscriminate, unaddressed hate mail and cast it carelessly to the wind atop the tallest building in town
- Ask yourself, "Am I only cruel to Rebecca Black because I am envious of her blissful innocence and youthful perspective?"
- Ask yourself, "Can I not make every day a 'Friday,' if only I adopt the proper positive attitude?"
- Ask yourself, "Is this song really any dumber than 'Party Rock Anthem?'"
- No. Now read a book.
What's your favorite meme since Friday?