Need a Sick Day? Use One of These Hilarious Excuses!

Sometimes in life, things happen. A rocket-launcher mishap? Body-switching event? A zit that should never see the harsh, unforgiving light of the sun? Yep, sounds like you need a day to regroup. A day to learn how to love again. A sick day. And all you need to make it happen is one good excuse. Choose wisely!

• I am in the middle of making my room look like a 1920's speakeasy and I've overdosed on rubber-cement fumes.

• I'm re-reading all 7 Harry Potters, and the Chronicles of Narnia, and Lord of the Rings. I'm gonna be gone awhile.

• Sorry … I … um … this is awkward, but I … well … I had a jet-pack malfunction.

• I have to complete my reality show casting video. There's also a nine-page questionnaire, so you know I'm not coming in tomorrow, either.

• My car transformed into a robot.

• While walking to the bus stop this morning, I realized I had left my straightening iron on. I went home to turn it off. I started walking back to the bus stop, but then I remembered I had left my homework on my desk in my room. I went home to get it. I started down the stairs for the third time and thought I'd forgotten my keys. I searched all over the house for them, but after about 10 minutes, I looked back and saw them hanging in the lock on the front door. They were there all along. After all that, I raced to the bus stop. I just missed the bus. And stepped in dog poo. Frankly, I just gave up.

• Can't come in today. Umm, I'm trying to find all the keys in Super Mario World. It's an emergency.

• My grandfather took me to a island of genetically reanimated dinosaurs. It's a long story, but the power got shut off and now I've got a bloody ear and I'm basically running for my life. Sidenote: Velociraptors can open doors? Why?!

• An eccentric billionaire left me a lot of money! I'm off to race around the world in a hot-air balloon!

• The call is coming from inside the house!

• Sprayed by a skunk. Don't inquire within if you know what's good for you.

• I need to learn all the words to rap songs. All the rap songs.

• Highlights gone awry.

• I was up late re-watching season 2 of Buffy the Vampire Slayer on Netflix. Angel's lost his soul. I'm in mourning.

• Too much caffeine. Do you know that a lightbulb can burn for … red is the best color on earth, don't you … The Pussycat Dolls. What happened to them? … Can't … keep … my … mind straight. Too much caffeine.

• I'm in the midst of a very important "family" meeting. Yes, this "family" is "The Duggars" and no, I'm not technically a Duggar (although who would know, right?!) … but seriously. This trainwreck isn't going to watch itself, am I right?

• I accidentally ate some soap this morning. There was a clear drop of it on my hand, which I thought was water. I licked it off, but it wasn't water. It was soap. I ate soap. I'm going back to bed.

• My mom and I switched bodies. No really! It was a enchanted fortune cookie that did it.

• I was dead the whole time. I'm a ghost. Oh, sorry. Spoiler alert!

What's your best "I need a sick day" excuse? Have you ever pulled a Ferris Bueller and faked being sick so you could stay home from school?

Related post: Save Ferris! How To Play Sick