50 Candy Hearts We Wish Existed (and 50 We Would Spit Out on Principle)

Candy hearts: so good or no good? I personally feel that they taste like chalk and should be avoided at all costs, but they're a fan-favorite this time of year, so haters to the left! Me, that means me. To the left I go.

But wait! Wouldn't it be fun if we had a list of things we'd hate to see on candy hearts, and also a list of things we'd love to see on them? We thought so, too! Get with the new candy-heart slang, ya'll.

Ok, ok, back to the left. I'm going. Watch me go. You'll miss me.

50 candy hearts that would make you roll your eyes real hard:
MARRY RICH
KISS = GERMS
UH-OH
BIEBER ROX
MOM'S HERE
ZZZZZZZ
IT GETS WRSE
SNGL AGN?
SPOILR ALRT
SHHHH
TBL 4 1?
UR FIRED
2B CONT'D
CAT LADY
GIVE UP
NOT U
GOT A GUN?
LIL' EDIE
CAML TOE
NVR ARGUE
SWEATY
EW
JUST STOP
FAIL
NSFW
IT'S NOT HIM…
… IT'S YOU
LADYLIKE
NBK 4EVA
HORCRUX
BORING
IT AIN'T FAIR
VANILLA
GROW UP
CHEAT 2 WIN
BAD 2 WRSE
HORSE BUTT
UNFUNNY
LIFE TBD
HIDE
WR LPSTK
MORE SPANX
NO 2 LOGIC
HATE THG
JUST SAY YES
YAY DRACO
BOY CRAZY!
FUTURE PLN?
B PROPER
$$ = HAPPY

50 candy hearts that would make you do a victory lap:
BOOO V DAY
MSTAKES OK
MK FETCH HAPN
DAMN GURL
HP ROX
FRAK
B LOUD
ROBOTS!
GEEK IS CHIC
UR DR. WHO
FMINISM FTW
GLTR
HUGSNSTUFF
BFF > BF
FUN > THIN
CAKE > PIE
PIE > CAKE
SMRT > PRTY
BRNG SNAX
EAT CANDY
XPCTO PATRNM
FUTR PREZ
GAMER
QUEEN FEY
GO. DO.
DRGON TAT
UR A WZRD!
U=PERF
MAGS LIE
A+ CURVS
1 RING
2 RULE
US ALL
FAN GIRL
HERE
COMES
THE
SUN
DOO
DOO
DOO
DOO
NERDS RULE
ALWYS RITE
I'M DOIN ME
FIERCE
SQUEE!
XO GLASSES
TREAT YO SELF
U R STRONG

We agree with all of theses—except "SWEATY," which we firmly believe should be switched to the LOVE list. What phrases do you want to see on candy hearts this Valentine's Day?

Valentine's Day posts galore are right here!