The Worst Hiding Spots for Hide and Seek

So you want to play some hide and seek! That's sort of weird. Are you a babysitter or something? Oh well, no matter. Whether you're about to compete in a mean game of H&S, or you're just a H&S enthusiast scouring the web for articles about H&S strategy, you'll want to read about these terrible hiding places.

• That fancy room that nobody is allowed to go in. Seriously, you guys. Nobody is allowed to go in there. And so nobody will ever find you. And you'll be there forever, or until you get really hungry or have to pee. Also, you might break something or get lint on that couch! That's the worst.
• The cookie pantry. Do you know how hard it is to hide in the cookie pantry and not eat all the cookies? That's what is driving the childhood obesity epidemic. Too many kids hiding in cookie pantries. Actually, we just made up this "cookie pantry" concept to be humorous, and bring up the childhood obesity epidemic. Do "cookie pantries" really exist? Entire pantries filled with cookies? We hope so!
• Your parents' bedroom. You might find your parents' underwear, and that is not something you can unsee. It's best not to think about parents' underwear. In fact, pretend they don't wear underwear. Actually, that is sort of gross, too. Next...
• The laundry room. Why did you just do that? You know the cat's litter box is in there.
• The bounce house. Dude, you have a bounce house? Why are you playing hide and seek?! There's a house to be bounced in!
• Your bed. Sometimes when people with really comfy beds get under the covers, they have automatic reactions that they cannot help. Like, they fall asleep and start to drool. Or start admitting that they are the ones who clogged up the toilet the other day. Or they rip off all their clothes. All of these things are kind of like the things you read about in the embarrassing story section of teen magazines. Except they're much, much worse.
• Your mom's car. You know she's totally going to drive away, and what if you don't realize it for like 35 minutes and it turns out she's driving to your grandma's house two states away? There is no way she's going to turn around to take you home, and it looks like you just lost your hide and seek game.

That only leaves one place, really:

• The bathtub. Everyone hide in the bathtub, always. And then go play in the bounce house. This game is getting really boring.

What's the best hiding spot for hide and seek?

Related post: The Pros and Cons of Babysitting