Megan Teaches You How to Make a Christmas Craft and It Makes Little to No Sense. Enjoy.

If you do not decorate your abode for the holidays, you are an awful person.

Just kidding. But really, I think much less of you. You should do something about that. BUT WHAT?!  Well look at that, Megan has made a guide. A guide that makes coherent sense. A guide that doesn’t involve a bear wearing a tuxedo. I think that, in and of itself, is a Christmas miracle.

No but really, I try hard, so hard, to be crafty and it usually devolves into me curled in the fetal position, sobbing and surrounded by popsicle sticks and pipe cleaners, and there’s paint in my hair and my face is super-glued to the floor and my tears are doing nothing to help with that problem. I’m bad at crafts, is what I’m saying. But the other day my roommate and I stumbled upon an idea! And idea that even I could do!  MEGAN, YOU CAN DO THIS, I said to myself, completely disregarding quotation marks and instead just settling for capitalization. And this is what happened:

Wowwww, it’s festive!  And glittery! And I only burned myself with the hot glue gun 4 times! And now you can too. Here's how:

First, admire the mediocre photographs I took of my artistic process, and then read the steps VERY CAREFULLY, so as to avoid hot glue gun disasters and permanent psychological damage.

STEP ONE:  Assemble the things.

You will need beautiful ribbons, sparkly glitters, circular wooden cutouts, and popsicle sticks of the used or new variety. You will also need white pearly paint and a hot glue gun but I couldn’t find either of those things so use your imagination here. You can buy all of this stuff at a hobby store. It’s magical.

STEP TWO: USE THE THINGS.

Decide what your snowflake pattern is going to be.  I suggest using six…um…spokes? Snowflake branches?  Long, poky things? Whatever.  Six of ‘em. Flip over a circle so that the ugly tag is on the backside. Arrange six popsicle sticks around the circle, evenly spaced.  If you don’t space it right, your snowflake will look like a slightly lopsided snowflake. You could measure it, but I’m lazy so I just arranged the popsicle sticks opposite from each other first, so that I knew they were all directly across from each other. Hot glue the sticks and try really hard not to get any glue on your face, and if you do, don’t press your face to the floor in an act of foolish defiance.

You can choose whatever snowflake pattern you want, but a good base is the flower ninja star design.

Again, make sure to do opposite sides first so that the angles match up.  Also, when you glue these down, settle on a pattern of gluing.  You can’t just glue every popsicle stick on top of the other because it will end up uneven and ugly looking. Think about it. I know that’s confusing. Just listen to me and glue in an over-under pattern, placing one end of each popsicle stick on top of the one before it, and the other end under the next stick. Continue thinking about that. I’m also confused. Look at the ends of the sticks in the picture above and you’ll get it.  (Good thing I’m a writer who isn’t good with words, eh?)

Next, make the spoke-branch-sticky-outy parts.

Then, paint the snowflake.  Sprinkle glitter on the spots you want to shimmer magically while the paint is still wet.  I did the circle in the middle and the outermost sticks. And yea verily, it was magical. And the townspeople rejoiced.

Let the paint dry, and then pull out your festive ribbon.  Make a loop, glue it like that, then glue THAT to the circular piece in the middle. Let the whole thing dry while it sits on your rug like a dummy.

STEP THREE: PROUDLY DISPLAY IT FOR THE WHOLE WORLD TO SEE.

WOW. STUNNING. Will you be attempting this miraculous Christmas craft? Do you have any other crafty DIY holiday ideas?

Related post: Cute Christmas!