What Do Parents Want for Christmas??

By Emma

December 13, 2011

Emma: I don't want to chat
i just want to read this website
Emily: It's so good
Chelsea: it is the best website i've ever seen.
Emma: me too.
speaking of parents...

what do they like to get for christmas??
Chelsea: every single year, my dad asks for socks and world peace.
Emily: i take it you get him world peace?
socks are kind of expensive
Chelsea: once i drew him a picture of a bunch of peas holding hands and standing on top of a globe. WORLD. PEAS. get it? hilarious.
Emily: Oh brother.
Emma: :/
Chelsea: WELL HE LIKED IT, AND THAT'S WHAT MATTERS.
Emily: NOW I CAN TALK ABOUT MY CRAFTY CHRISTMAS PRESENT!
hooray!
JAN WINTER, IF YOU ARE READING THIS, GO DO SOME WORK.
Emma: jan winter, if you are reading this, how do you get your skin to look so nice?
Emily: Sundae Riley skin care.
Emma: what is that?? is it made of ice cream?
Emily: I think it is just a wildly pricey line of creams
Emma: well, it's clearly worth EVERY PENNY
(sparklers, emily's mom came to the office, and she has the face skin of a 9-year-old)
Emily: oh she will be so happy to see that!
The DIY Mom & Dad idea is to make them each a FAKE BOOK about them.
But it is really just a box that looks like a book, so you only have to decorate the outside
And on the inside cover it has all the "chapters." on the back inside it has "about the author"
Emma: CUTE! what do you do on the inside?
draw pictures of them and paste stuff in?
Emily: We're doing it in photoshop and decoupaging
Chelsea: that's SO cute! damn, i feel like i should return those socks and do this instead.
Emily: But you can fill the book with socks!
Chelsea: what do you do for the chapter titles?
Emily: They are all inside jokes that are probably super boring to you guys :(
Chelsea: I LOVE INSIDE JOKES. just tell us one!
Emily: For example, the title of my mom's book is "Just Pop in a Lean Cuisine: How to Get Your Sh*t Together with the Help of Jeggings, Cabs, and Other Modern Conveniences"
and the chapter titles are like "Your whole life is a break" and "It is what it is"
Emma: oh my god
i'm so excited for this present
Chelsea: hahahaha that is PERFECT! your parents are going to cry like babies.
Emma: wait, we can't post this chat!!
jan will see it!!!!!!!!
Emily: I told Jan not to read
she didn't use to read anything anyway
this is a new attempt at being mom-like.
Emma: what made her start?
Emily: i think one of her client's kids was talking about how she loved sparklife and my mom felt guilty
Emma: what's the best thing you've ever given your parents?
Emily: THIS IS my best gift
you guys?
Chelsea: probably that drawing of the peas.
Emily: bahaha
Emma: i made my dad a diorama once, for his birthday
it was an ocean scene
and i hung a goldfish in it
with a bubble saying "happy birthday"
Emily: how old were you?
31
jk, i think 10 maybe?
Emily: hahaha i believed 31 completely
Emma: what do your parents get each other?
Emily: sundae riley skin care
Chelsea: one time my dad got my mom a hamper full of cleaning supplies and a vaccum and she was SO upset that she stopped opening it and failed to discover the diamond necklace at the bottom.
Emma: WHAT??
Emily: ahhhhh!
Chelsea: REALLY.
Emma: chelsea that's like an o. henry story
Emily: that is AWESOME!!!!!!!
Emma: so what happened? did he have to force her to keep going?
Chelsea: she was furious and he had to calm her down and dig the necklace out himself and give it to her. it was her birthday, which is also VALENTINES DAY. do i win the pulitzer?
Emma: yes, AND the nobel in literature!
Emily: yes!
bahahaha
oh that was a good one
Emma: was she mad at him for tricking her?
or just thrilled because diamond necklace?
Chelsea: she was mad at first, but then she forgave him and we all ate candy.
Emily: your parents sound fun!
Emma: yeah, they really do
Chelsea: MY PARENTS ARE THE BEST PARENTS.
Emily: once me and my sister got up at 5 a.m. when the sun was perfect and took freezing photos of ourselves
using her nice camera they bought her
we framed them and our chins look HUGE
Emma: do you have the pic??
Emily: :(
maybe.... brb
Chelsea: WOW YOU ARE TAKING FOREVER. does anyone have a quarter i can borrow so i can buy some oatmeal?
Emma: yes
Emily: no, i dont have the photo but i do have a quarter
does that mean we're done chatting?
Emma: sure!
i'll make our names pretty colors
Chelsea: i'll eat oatmeal purchased with your hard-earned money!