Flyergirl Takes On Google's How-Tos
flyergirl13 has decided to tackle some of the most-asked questions of all time—and she's starting with the A list.—Sparkitors
In my last post, I wrote a helpful guide to the most-searched Google how-to question: How To Tie a Tie. Then, I had a brilliant idea: I should write a guide for all the Google most-searched how-tos, from A to Z. It's a large undertaking, but my wealth of how-to knowledge should serve me well in this project. It'll be like Hank Green answering every most-searched question, and everyone knows that if Hank Green does something, it must be awesome.
Without further ado, let's move on to the As. I might do more than one per post, because some how-tos won't require very much explanation. This is an experiment—you tell me how it goes!
How to Ask a Girl Out
Considering that I am a girl, I'll answer this as how I'd like to be asked out. First, take me to a romantic location, then sit next to me as we watch the sunrise. Then, turn to me, tell me how awesome I am (I just can't seem to hear that enough), and ask me out.
If these are unreasonable expectations, here's a simpler guide:
1. Talk to the girl when she's not surrounded by her giggling friends
2. Tell her you like her
3. Ask her out
It seems simpler than it is. But don't forget, it's just a question—same as asking her what the math homework was or whether she has a pet velociraptor (why yes I do, thank you for asking), just more serious and important, and with consequences that could make or break the rest of your life.
How to Add Fractions
This is a tough one. I'll try to explain as best I can. Say we have 1/2 + 1/4
1. Multiply 1/2 by the sqaure root of pi.
2. Cube 1/4 and add three times the denominator plus eight.
3. Find the prime factors of 84 and take the common logarithm of their sum.
4. The answer is 3/4.
How to Activate a Verizon Phone
This is difficult, because Verizon would prefer to have your head on a stake rather than attached to the rest of your body. Yes, this is a fact. Don't you ever wonder why you haven't seen Cousin Willy in a few years?
First, you press the "on" button. If that fails, look for somethin vaguely related to activation, and click it. If it doesn't work, try something else. Eventually, give up and call Verizon for help. Make sure to keep a firm grasp on your head for the entire call; you never know when they might launch the attack.
How to Ask For a Raise
Asking for raises is easy if you know how to interact with people. Think of the people you admire, and some of their traits. You'll notice that they are all loud, boisterous, and perhaps unemployed.
Basically, you want to be imposing. Bosses like it when you're sure of yourself and confident, so stride into his/her office and demand a 34% increase in salary. You should raise your voice and slam your fists on the desk for emphasis. The boss will be so impressed by you that you'll immediately get a raise. It's a foolproof method.
Oh, so that's how you add fractions! To think, we've been doing it wrong all these years...Do you like the idea of flyergirl answering Google's most-searched questions from A-Z?
Related post: Flyergirl Tells You How