The Life of a Hufflepuff

By Contributor

August 10, 2011

geetargrl59 has us 98% convinced that she actually lives at Hogwarts.—Sparkitors

The life of a Hufflepuff is not a glamorous life, nor is it an exciting one. We are simple folk who take pleasure in mildly entertaining activities such as playing Wizard's Checkers, magically knitting totes, and watching reruns of the 1970's show "The Cauldron Clan". But nevertheless, it's a great House filled with pretty cool people!

As everyone knows, Hufflepuffs are hard-working, non-judgmental, loyal, and friendly; basically, we're the magical human equivalent to Labrador Retrievers. Sure, we may not be super-geniuses or brave or evil or special in any way whatsoever, but when you need a friend, we're there for you! It's like that song "You Got a Friend in Me" from the wizard movie Toy Story (which is basically the same as the Muggle version, only it's a documentary about the consequences of using magic on toys and the chaos they cause).

We're a very accepting bunch. As the Sorting Hat said in 1995, "Slytherin took only pure-blood wizards of great cunning just like him. And only those of sharpest mind were taught by Ravenclaw while the bravest and the boldest went to daring Gryffindor. Good Hufflepuff, she took the rest." The Hufflepuff House is the community college of the wizarding world, which some would say is a bad thing, but we say otherwise!

Lately, we've been getting a bad rap from other Houses, especially the Bergstein House (STOP CALLING US HUFFLE-TOUGHS! It's not funny!). Because of excessive mockery and teasing of the extremely sensitive Hufflepuffles, lots of us are lying about our sorting placement and have lost pride in who we are. Our numbers are dwindling, which is surprising considering the instant you walk into Hogwarts you're already a Hufflepuff unless the Sorting Hat moves you up. But I say no more lying! No more shame! I am a proud Hufflepuff and I stand tall for what I believe in: friendship, equality, and using real flowers for decor!

Hufflepuffles, stand with me! Show the world who you really are! Because, realistically, not everyone can get into Gryffindor or Slytherin. Make sure you show the world your black and yellow colors come October (or sooner) when we rule the virtual school on Pottermore!

Hufflepuff out, witches.

Is anyone else out there particularly good at finding things? Stand up, Hufflepuffs!