Are You Sleep-Deprived? Are You Sleeping Right Now? IS THIS ALL A DREAM?!

Anne_The_Bam can't get enough SparkLife, which means she can't get enough sleep. We blame ourselves—but we also give ourselves HIGH FIVES for being AWESOME.—Sparkitors

Hi, my name is Anne_The_Bam, and I have a problem: I have an addiction to Spark Life. I know almost every SparkLife author by name, I accidentally make references to articles only to be given “The Look” by the person I’m talking to, and I obsessively wait around for my favorite authors to post. (If I sit here long enough Dan WILL post something…I just know it!) Well, it recently got so bad that there was an intervention; my parents sat me down and pointed out that I could be holding a job or at least sleeping at night with the time that I was spending on SparkLife. Then I got inspired; no, not to get a job, but to channel my addiction into something (vaguely) productive! I decided to write a post about (you guessed it) sleep deprivation! I believe this is what you call irony, folks. So here goes!

Signs you are sleep-deprived:

1. You set your alarm thirty minutes before you actually have to get up in order to trick your body into thinking you slept in. (This doesn’t help, trust me!)

2. You piss on a bear every spring. I said you mishear everything, darn it! Yoo also spel like this, but yoo speak much more better when yoo hav sleep.

3. You start repeating yourself without realizing it.

4. You start mumbling gibberish and you have no recollection of it. But you know you've done it because you saw the video that your friends put on YouTube that now has 1,000,000 views, and you really, really hope that Jeremy from physics class doesn’t see it, because you were totally saying his name and…uh, never mind.

5. You start repeating yourself without realizing it.

6. You just now understood number two...and you think it’s funny!

7. You laughed when I said "number two." You would also giggle if I said duty, tinkle, or cherry pineapples (don’t ask me how I know that).

8. You bump into people and walls all the time because your eyes are closed, and you apologize profusely to every wall you bump into.  (I don’t know what you are talking about. I have never done this before.)

9. When you do end up sleeping, you dream about sleeping. (This always confuses me, because I start wondering if I’m dreaming that I’m dreaming that I’m asleep or if I'm dreaming that I'm awake, dreaming that I'm asleep. This is starting to sound suspiciously like the plot of Inception.)

10. You are still trying to figure out number two. And number five is completely beyond you.

11. You fell asleep before even getting to this number.

Are you a SparkLife-addicted sleepless zombie? We sure hope so.

Related post: What to Do When You Can't Sleep