Real Things That Are Less Believable Than Santa Claus

Christmas spoiler alert: There is no Santa Claus. At least that's what our parents told us. At least, that's what they told us after telling us the exact opposite for almost 10 years. Parents get so confused sometimes! But so do we. Why is the idea of Santa Claus so unbelievable when we have the Great Pyramids, space travel, and the Sham Wow? Those are amazing things, but we don't doubt they exist. Maybe it's time to reexamine this Santa Claus thing. Because if these things are true, it's not so hard to believe Santa's the real deal. 

• Dinosaurs. So, we're positive the fat man in the red suit does not exist. But we're cool with the idea of a walking, breathing, turtle-formed, gigantic-hand-clawed Therizinosaurus?
• Brangelina's Offpsring. That's what happens when two of the most beautiful, famous, and photographed people reproduce. It could blow your mind. And get this—there are three of them.
• The Post Office. A uniformed man will come to your house, pick up your letter, and deliver it to whoever you want, within a few days, for 44 cents. That's a holiday miracle if we ever saw one. Do you know how much we would charge you to do that? Too good to be true.
• Crocs. Too ugly to be true.
• That bowl-meal-thing from KFC. If the first time you heard about it you thought it was a joke, we're with you.
• Angelina (of Jersey Shore)'s hit music single "I'm Hot". That. Actually. Just. Happened.
• Fresh Direct. They will bring you  your groceries to your house. Say goodbye to those annoying carts with broken wheels. Also, it means you can get a can of Cheez-Whiz without doing a thing! You can also get buttloads of...
• Cookie Dough Ice Cream. Society today (for some reason) looks down upon people inhaling a tube of cookie dough ice cream in public. But if the tasty stuff is mixed in ice cream, it's totally acceptable. Weird, but fine with us! Deliciousness buried in more deliciousness! Mind topping it off with whipped cream?
• Air Travel. Are you ever flying in an airplane and look out the window and think to yourself "How the H-E-Double Hockey Sticks is this ginormous and freakishly heavy aircraft staying in the air?" You don't have an answer, do you? That's because airplanes are too good to be true.
• The Pop Tarts Store in New York City. We heard you don't need a college degree to get a job here, so now we're kicking ourselves for wasting four years in stinky college laboratories and tiny dorm rooms, where we wrote essays about dead writers and their prose. That's $40,000+ down the drain!
• Coke Zero. You sure this stuff doesn't have calories? Like none? Why does it taste so much better than Diet Coke?

What do you think is almost-too-good-to-be-true, yet less believable than Santa?

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