Warning: Do NOT Take Chemistry Class

MademoiselleCoccinelle is not a fan of chemistry—and after reading this, we understand why!—Sparkitors

Walking up to the chemistry lab, you can't help but feel as though you’re descending down the path into Hades’ seven circles of hell. Voluntarily taking a chemistry course is EXACTLY like selling your soul to Satan—ok, that might be a bit of an over-statement, but don’t blame me— those fumes from the lab are getting to my head! If I still haven't made myself clear, let me put it this way: a chemistry class is the equivalent of a Potions lesson. You're locked up in a dark, dingy dungeon with Professor Snape, but instead of brewing up a cauldron of the Draught of Living Death and winning that bottle of Felix Felicis, you end up calculating the number of moles of chlorine present in industrial bleach. Blech. And don't forget the added bonus of alarmingly itchy palms, because your school is too cheap to provide you with latex gloves. Still not convinced that you should avoid chemistry class at all costs? Read on.

Not so long ago, you thought that chemistry classes would be super-cool. I've been there my friend. In fact, we ALL have. We dreamt of becoming an indisputable legend who selflessly freed the students from fifth-period maths and forced the school authorities to announce an extended lunch time because somebody had somehow managed to make a glass of pure distilled water explode. Yep, you thought you’d have tons of fun reveling in your success and your genius—well, think again! Here's a list of reasons why chemistry should be banned:

1. It will eat you alive— and we’re talking big, big, hairy monsters

2. No matter how hard you try, your experiments will always go south.

3.  You will wake up to find test tubes wrapped in carbonated aluminium foil under the Christmas tree.

4. It’s forbidden to eat or drink in the lab. You can't even chew even mints, which means you won't be asking out your lab partner any time soon.

5. Harry Potter never studied chemistry. (He also never took  Home Economics, but that’s a different issue.)

6. Nobody will ever want to strike up a conversation about halogens with you.

7. Spontaneously answering a question will always be a bad idea—same goes for trying to write a freestyle rap of the periodic table.

8. Spontaneously combusting will also always be a bad idea. If you have to ask why, I can't help you.

Make no mistake: chemistry is the kind of dream that will inevitably turn sour. To the younger generations reading this: SAVE YOURSELVES! Beware of the alluring charms of the chemistry lab; it is a land where time stands still and your fingernails turn yellow, a parallel universe where a creepy guy TRIES to teach you about protons whilst convincing you that he is really an under-cover agent of the secret services (he's not). There is no plus side to this class.

Do you feel the same about chemistry? Or would you defend this class to the DEATH?

Related post: Megan's Life Lessons: How To Get An A in Chemistry